I think that if you are pregnant and your husband punches you in the uterus you should never call the police but just go to the hospital. I called the police and they didn't care about what he did but said I was the "primary aggressor" because I tried to look at his phone right before it happened. I had tried to leave him 2 weeks before and he spent that time in between then and trying to kill the baby by injuring himself and making "documentations" of his self-inflicted injuries and saying I did it. He used these to try to blackmail me into being afraid to call the police and then did eveything in his power to scare me into calling the police. His plan finally worked when he tried to kill the baby because I called 911. I was totally incoherent, crying hysterically and praying for my baby. I was not "present" with the police when they were asking questions because I was in shock and trying to pray. I couldn't believe he had really tried to kill our child and didn't even admit that to myself for several more days. Meanwhile, he spent 45 minutes calmly wowing the officers with a computer presentation that he had spent 2 weeks preparing for this very moment. I was left alone during that time, crying hysterically as I looked at the wall calendar of a newborn in the next room. When they asked if I wanted medical attention I began wailing "What can they do? It's either going to live or die! What can they do??" And I cried and cried. Then they started making accusations and I tried to be honest about how our argument started and my part in it. They kept cutting me off when I tried to explain. I was not in a state to be able to try to manipulate the truth the way my husband obviously was. I thought they were going to help me but they took me to jail and he went home to my pets and possessions. I spent the next two days worrying he was going to hurt or neglect my cats. When I got to the police station they asked if I was suicidal and I said "yes" and they asked if anyone in my family had commited suicide and I told them that three people had. When I saw the paperwork later I saw that he had checked "no" next to both boxes. He asked if I was pregnant and I said I was, and then later he asked if I was injured and I said yes, that I had just been punched in the uterus. He was alread moving on to the next question when another cop who overheard said, "You're pregnant and you just got punched in the uterus?" And I said, "YES!!!" and that is the first time anyone tried to help me. Awhile later the door to the little cell opened and 5 large burly men (3 medics and 2 cops) opened the door and said they were all going to examine me. I was in my flimsy pajmas with no bra on and I tried to hide my boobs. I've been through a lifetime of physical and sexual abuse and all these large men were so intimidating that I said I wasn't going to have any men looking at me under any circumstances. They said there were no females available and asked if I was "refusing medical attention" as if that would be a crime. But then one kind young man, one of the medics, got down on one knee and very calmly looked into my eyes and said, "it's okay, we just want to take your blood pressure and heartrate." He made me feel safe and I said okay but NOBODY was going to be getting any peeks at my body. They took me to the ER. Many hours later they tell me there is a hemmorage on the gestational sac and that there is a 50% chance my baby will die. I had been to my OB days before and although I hadn't had an ultrasound yet they said everything was fine at that time. On the way back to be booked into jail I had my head together enough to ask why they weren't arresting my husband. I wasn't trying to weasel out of anything myself, but I asked why they didn't arrest us both at least. Forgetting what he did to me, why wasn't he being held accountable for injuring an unborn baby intentionally? Well he said that policy is to only arrest one person. I have never been arrested before (my husband has, twice, both for violent offenses including DV) and they put me in a cell for 6 hours with a bunch of drug-addicts. I spoke to their jail lawyer before my arraignment and she made it seem like plea-bargaining and saying "guilty" was the normal way to go, but I was cognizant enough by this point to at least plead Not Guilty so I could finally talk to a lawyer. Now I am living in a hotel and unable to go within 500ft of my home, where my husband is probably destroying my artwork and screwing someone else on my hand-made quilt. I was allowed to go there and spend 15 minutes grabbing what I could, and thank God I was able to rescue my cats, who are safe and with me. I have a lawyer. I haven't miscarried and it's been three days so hopefully the baby will live and not have any terrible disabilities. My husband got off scott-free. SO AGAIN MY ADVICE IF YOUR HUSBAND TRIES TO KILL YOUR UNBORN BABY IS GO TO THE HOSPITAL. Do not call the police under any circumstance, because you will be crying too hard for them to understand a word you say.
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I think that if you are pregnant and your husband punches you in the uterus you should never call the police but just go to the hospital. I called the police and they didn't care about what he did but said I was the "primary aggressor" because I tried to look at his phone right before it happened. I had tried to leave him 2 weeks before and he spent that time in between then and trying to kill the baby by injuring himself and making "documentations" of his self-inflicted injuries and saying I did it. He used these to try to blackmail me into being afraid to call the police and then did eveything in his power to scare me into calling the police. His plan finally worked when he tried to kill the baby because I called 911. I was totally incoherent, crying hysterically and praying for my baby. I was not "present" with the police when they were asking questions because I was in shock and trying to pray. I couldn't believe he had really tried to kill our child and didn't even admit that to myself for several more days. Meanwhile, he spent 45 minutes calmly wowing the officers with a computer presentation that he had spent 2 weeks preparing for this very moment. I was left alone during that time, crying hysterically as I looked at the wall calendar of a newborn in the next room. When they asked if I wanted medical attention I began wailing "What can they do? It's either going to live or die! What can they do??" And I cried and cried. Then they started making accusations and I tried to be honest about how our argument started and my part in it. They kept cutting me off when I tried to explain. I was not in a state to be able to try to manipulate the truth the way my husband obviously was. I thought they were going to help me but they took me to jail and he went home to my pets and possessions. I spent the next two days worrying he was going to hurt or neglect my cats. When I got to the police station they asked if I was suicidal and I said "yes" and they asked if anyone in my family had commited suicide and I told them that three people had. When I saw the paperwork later I saw that he had checked "no" next to both boxes. He asked if I was pregnant and I said I was, and then later he asked if I was injured and I said yes, that I had just been punched in the uterus. He was alread moving on to the next question when another cop who overheard said, "You're pregnant and you just got punched in the uterus?" And I said, "YES!!!" and that is the first time anyone tried to help me. Awhile later the door to the little cell opened and 5 large burly men (3 medics and 2 cops) opened the door and said they were all going to examine me. I was in my flimsy pajmas with no bra on and I tried to hide my boobs. I've been through a lifetime of physical and sexual abuse and all these large men were so intimidating that I said I wasn't going to have any men looking at me under any circumstances. They said there were no females available and asked if I was "refusing medical attention" as if that would be a crime. But then one kind young man, one of the medics, got down on one knee and very calmly looked into my eyes and said, "it's okay, we just want to take your blood pressure and heartrate." He made me feel safe and I said okay but NOBODY was going to be getting any peeks at my body. They took me to the ER. Many hours later they tell me there is a hemmorage on the gestational sac and that there is a 50% chance my baby will die. I had been to my OB days before and although I hadn't had an ultrasound yet they said everything was fine at that time. On the way back to be booked into jail I had my head together enough to ask why they weren't arresting my husband. I wasn't trying to weasel out of anything myself, but I asked why they didn't arrest us both at least. Forgetting what he did to me, why wasn't he being held accountable for injuring an unborn baby intentionally? Well he said that policy is to only arrest one person. I have never been arrested before (my husband has, twice, both for violent offenses including DV) and they put me in a cell for 6 hours with a bunch of drug-addicts. I spoke to their jail lawyer before my arraignment and she made it seem like plea-bargaining and saying "guilty" was the normal way to go, but I was cognizant enough by this point to at least plead Not Guilty so I could finally talk to a lawyer. Now I am living in a hotel and unable to go within 500ft of my home, where my husband is probably destroying my artwork and screwing someone else on my hand-made quilt. I was allowed to go there and spend 15 minutes grabbing what I could, and thank God I was able to rescue my cats, who are safe and with me. I have a lawyer. I haven't miscarried and it's been three days so hopefully the baby will live and not have any terrible disabilities. My husband got off scott-free. SO AGAIN MY ADVICE IF YOUR HUSBAND TRIES TO KILL YOUR UNBORN BABY IS GO TO THE HOSPITAL. Do not call the police under any circumstance, because you will be crying too hard for them to understand a word you say.
June 16, 2012 - 12:49pmThis Comment
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