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I agree with miscortes that it would help to have more information about the type of communication issues your are having with your teen. I am a mother of two and every waking day I have to come up with new strategies to reach out to their world. "Remember when you were a teen?" is the question I ask myself a lot. I look back in time and try to find similar attitudes and responses I used to come up with. One thing I remember is that at that age I thought I knew everything and my parents did not. Sure enough, teens today are not different. They know EVERYTHING! But what many parents truly do not know is that the teenager brain is undergoing very radical chemical changes during this stage in their life. PBS had a great program on this and here is a link you may find fascinating to read.
http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/teenbrain/work/

Another thing I have learned just in the past few months is to relate to my kids not at the level of parent-child with a top down authority at all times, but to think of them beyond the physical bodies. I believe in a soul and I also know that souls are ageless. So, eventhough this physical body in front of me is my 15 year old daughter, she is also an ageless soul and we have agreed to talk at that level once in a while. She enjoys that option when it is appropriate.

Being a mom, I find it more challenging to relate to my son who is younger and totally different in his approach to life. However, he is not as complex on his demands, so a simple conversation with very clear directives (and NO DRAMA!) works with him. Not easy task, as I try to dramatize too much...it is part of my learning too.

Here is a link to a great site I use as resource

http://www.tandemjourney.org/Page.asp?NavID=11

January 3, 2009 - 12:02am

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