My husband and I have been together for going on 8 years but just got married last month.
Shortly after we met and began dating he let me know that he had lost both his kidneys when he was a child and now had a transplanted kidney that he had received when he was twelve.
This didn't change anything for me. Growing up my aunt had battled diabetes and kidney failure, it was something that my entire family had battled my entire childhood so it was a condition that I was familiar with.
For the first three years of our relationship everything was fine; he had regular doctors appointments, had to drink tons of water and had to take insane amounts of medication to keep the kidney going but this was nothing that I couldn't handle.
Then in 2010 his kidney failed; the next two years consisted of constant dr appointments, in home dialysis, traveling to other states to get on the kidney transplant list. For two years the only time I left the house was to go to work. I hooked him up to his dialysis machine every night, cleaned the sight where the tube was in his abdomen, sat in the ER with him on countless nights and even got tested to give him one of my own kidneys.
During this time the man I fell in love with disappeared. He became depressed, he no longer had any energy, lost every bit of his sex drive and pretty much just treated me as his nurse. Although I thought about leaving occasionally I always pushed the thoughts away and reminded myself of what he was going through.
In 2012 he received his transplant from a deceised donor. After the transplant things took a while to go back to normal, although it did take a while.
But in the past year everything has changed. He has been having horrible migraines and barely sleeps. His kidney is fine but he cannot seem to get rid of these migraines. At times I seriously consider the possibility that he has developed split personalities, sometimes he's perfect and is the man I fell in love with and that I married but then there are other times that he becomes a completely different person. He throws things, cuses, calls me every name you can think of, breaks things, blames me for anything and everything and more.
I just don't know what to do. When he's good, our marriage is great, it's far from perfect but we work together and things are fine. But when he's stressed or in pain and the other side of him comes out all I can do is cry and pray that something changes. I just don't know else to do. I try not to argue back, telling myself that he's in pain and he's feeling out of control but sometimes I can't help but yell back. I honestly just don't know what to do anymore, I really don't
Comment Reply
My husband and I have been together for going on 8 years but just got married last month.
Shortly after we met and began dating he let me know that he had lost both his kidneys when he was a child and now had a transplanted kidney that he had received when he was twelve.
This didn't change anything for me. Growing up my aunt had battled diabetes and kidney failure, it was something that my entire family had battled my entire childhood so it was a condition that I was familiar with.
For the first three years of our relationship everything was fine; he had regular doctors appointments, had to drink tons of water and had to take insane amounts of medication to keep the kidney going but this was nothing that I couldn't handle.
Then in 2010 his kidney failed; the next two years consisted of constant dr appointments, in home dialysis, traveling to other states to get on the kidney transplant list. For two years the only time I left the house was to go to work. I hooked him up to his dialysis machine every night, cleaned the sight where the tube was in his abdomen, sat in the ER with him on countless nights and even got tested to give him one of my own kidneys.
During this time the man I fell in love with disappeared. He became depressed, he no longer had any energy, lost every bit of his sex drive and pretty much just treated me as his nurse. Although I thought about leaving occasionally I always pushed the thoughts away and reminded myself of what he was going through.
In 2012 he received his transplant from a deceised donor. After the transplant things took a while to go back to normal, although it did take a while.
But in the past year everything has changed. He has been having horrible migraines and barely sleeps. His kidney is fine but he cannot seem to get rid of these migraines. At times I seriously consider the possibility that he has developed split personalities, sometimes he's perfect and is the man I fell in love with and that I married but then there are other times that he becomes a completely different person. He throws things, cuses, calls me every name you can think of, breaks things, blames me for anything and everything and more.
June 23, 2015 - 7:58pmI just don't know what to do. When he's good, our marriage is great, it's far from perfect but we work together and things are fine. But when he's stressed or in pain and the other side of him comes out all I can do is cry and pray that something changes. I just don't know else to do. I try not to argue back, telling myself that he's in pain and he's feeling out of control but sometimes I can't help but yell back. I honestly just don't know what to do anymore, I really don't
This Comment
Reply