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I have spent days packing up my share of our marriage. I also got him the bits I'm taking but that he will need - and then I stopped and thought why am I doing this? Caring for him is ingrained. I try very hard not to cry. I must keep focused on packing and trying to find a home for me, my pets and my 80yr old mum. When I am settled I can look at my broken heart.
I realise now that while I have lost him, he has lost himself. He said to me people dont seem to care - oh if he could hear what they are saying to me. He belongs to a service group - most of them know and they are disgusted with him. Our doctor, who is also a friend, called him a b@#&*#! and said it was the best thing for me. A very close friend said he was a disgrace. They all raise our vows.
My husband doesn't have to look after me. He just watches me get hurt. This is all about sex and my drug induced weight gain revolts him. He told me hes not even interested in me, with a look of revulsion on his face.
I feel destroyed inside. I will not love again.

August 5, 2015 - 1:17am

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