Wow, I can't imagine... I am sorry that happened to your Mom and to you, as well as to anyone else who might have been affected by his choice.
Before I get into it... let me first say, congratulations on your nuptials!! :)
Do I think there is a line of social acceptance? No, I actually do not think there is a line of social acceptance - so long as both individuals are old enough to legally be wed and aren't relatives! With that being said, I am relatively a non-conformist... so I don't tend to follow what is "acceptable", again so long as laws aren't broken and it's of each persons own free will.
Now to follow that up... I am a family oriented person. When I made the decision to begin dating my husband, I had to make sure that my son felt comfortable with him and that they got along. When I decided to marry him, I spoke it over with my son to make sure that he was going to transition into that without any worries or concerns. He of course was fine with it! So I DO believe that when you are in a marriage (certainly one of 42 years) you do have a commitment to your children and obviously the wife who you have spent the bulk of your life with. If they weren't happy and he wanted out... certainly to leave her for a younger woman and even more so, one that is younger than his own child or children... you risk losing the respect of the people in your life who ARE you life. That is not what I believe is the "socially acceptable" policy. More a moral commitment to the people in your life who you are breaking a commitment with and who will then be directly affected.
Can he do that? Sure, that is his right, choice and life to live... but as I mentioned earlier - when you make bold moves like that, it is @ a risk of damaging or possibly permanently altering crucial relationships who SHOULD count for a lot.
That is just an individual judgement call in my opinion! But again, as I stated before... although I wasn't married to my son's father any longer (had been divorced for almost 9 years) I still needed my son's blessing because he is my life!!
I hope that what I have said didn't offend you or come out to brash, I have a tendency to answer questions pretty direct. I am hopeful that it helped you and certainly if you want to discuss more... feel free!
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Wow, I can't imagine... I am sorry that happened to your Mom and to you, as well as to anyone else who might have been affected by his choice.
Before I get into it... let me first say, congratulations on your nuptials!! :)
Do I think there is a line of social acceptance? No, I actually do not think there is a line of social acceptance - so long as both individuals are old enough to legally be wed and aren't relatives! With that being said, I am relatively a non-conformist... so I don't tend to follow what is "acceptable", again so long as laws aren't broken and it's of each persons own free will.
Now to follow that up... I am a family oriented person. When I made the decision to begin dating my husband, I had to make sure that my son felt comfortable with him and that they got along. When I decided to marry him, I spoke it over with my son to make sure that he was going to transition into that without any worries or concerns. He of course was fine with it! So I DO believe that when you are in a marriage (certainly one of 42 years) you do have a commitment to your children and obviously the wife who you have spent the bulk of your life with. If they weren't happy and he wanted out... certainly to leave her for a younger woman and even more so, one that is younger than his own child or children... you risk losing the respect of the people in your life who ARE you life. That is not what I believe is the "socially acceptable" policy. More a moral commitment to the people in your life who you are breaking a commitment with and who will then be directly affected.
Can he do that? Sure, that is his right, choice and life to live... but as I mentioned earlier - when you make bold moves like that, it is @ a risk of damaging or possibly permanently altering crucial relationships who SHOULD count for a lot.
That is just an individual judgement call in my opinion! But again, as I stated before... although I wasn't married to my son's father any longer (had been divorced for almost 9 years) I still needed my son's blessing because he is my life!!
I hope that what I have said didn't offend you or come out to brash, I have a tendency to answer questions pretty direct. I am hopeful that it helped you and certainly if you want to discuss more... feel free!
July 19, 2009 - 3:14pmThis Comment
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