This article struck a cord with me...it was one of those 'I thought I was the only one' situations! My partner and I are feeling frustrated with our sexual life right now because it seems our libidos are very different. I will mention that my partner (actually 'spouse' since last week!) and I are both women. (I have spent most of my adult life (I'm 41 now) living as heterosexual until about 3 years ago when I discovered that I was more interested in women from a sexual and relationship point of view.)
I often felt with men I dated, that they went 'too fast' for me and I was more 'in the mood' for sex AFTER sex...this changed when I became involved with women...some sort of pressure was removed...I was free at last! BUT, I'm now in back in the same situation with my wife....feeling some sort of anxiety that I not as sexual as her! (She called me 'ice queen' once as a 'joke') I dont feel it is the case that she has a 'greater libido' than me at all.
There is an 11 year age gap between myself and my wife...she is 29 and, I feel, that her libido is more like the stereotypical male libido...orgasm focused (??) I then find myself in the steroetypical female-type situation where she asks; I refuse.
I dont blame either of us for the situation...and we'd both like to find a solution because, even tho we talk honestly about sexual matters, its really starting to effect our relationship.
AlexG
Comment Reply
This article struck a cord with me...it was one of those 'I thought I was the only one' situations! My partner and I are feeling frustrated with our sexual life right now because it seems our libidos are very different. I will mention that my partner (actually 'spouse' since last week!) and I are both women. (I have spent most of my adult life (I'm 41 now) living as heterosexual until about 3 years ago when I discovered that I was more interested in women from a sexual and relationship point of view.)
July 21, 2009 - 10:36amI often felt with men I dated, that they went 'too fast' for me and I was more 'in the mood' for sex AFTER sex...this changed when I became involved with women...some sort of pressure was removed...I was free at last! BUT, I'm now in back in the same situation with my wife....feeling some sort of anxiety that I not as sexual as her! (She called me 'ice queen' once as a 'joke') I dont feel it is the case that she has a 'greater libido' than me at all.
There is an 11 year age gap between myself and my wife...she is 29 and, I feel, that her libido is more like the stereotypical male libido...orgasm focused (??) I then find myself in the steroetypical female-type situation where she asks; I refuse.
I dont blame either of us for the situation...and we'd both like to find a solution because, even tho we talk honestly about sexual matters, its really starting to effect our relationship.
AlexG
This Comment
Reply