Hi Miss Elizabeth -
This situation sounds very frustrating, so let's see what can be done. Continuing to fake your orgasms isn't the best way to build trust in a relationship, and trust is a key component to growing together sexually.
You've said that you were a virgin, and he only had one other serious sexual relationship before you. In essence, both of you are new to this and learning together. In some ways though, it sounds like you may have more knowledge than he does and be more adventuresome.
Is there a way you could get him into a discussion about sexual pleasure outside of bed? Perhaps a different environment would help. Or perhaps a counselor who could bring a third party perspective would help. Or even using a book or videos that would help him better understand that women also have sexual needs.
Since you know that you can achieve orgasm, you have assurance that you don't have a physical problem in that area. What seems to be lacking is common ground between the two of you, and common goals. The more that can be done to help him better understand what you need, the better.
I hope that helps. Please let me know, and best wishes to you.
Take good care,
Pat
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Hi Miss Elizabeth -
This situation sounds very frustrating, so let's see what can be done. Continuing to fake your orgasms isn't the best way to build trust in a relationship, and trust is a key component to growing together sexually.
You've said that you were a virgin, and he only had one other serious sexual relationship before you. In essence, both of you are new to this and learning together. In some ways though, it sounds like you may have more knowledge than he does and be more adventuresome.
Is there a way you could get him into a discussion about sexual pleasure outside of bed? Perhaps a different environment would help. Or perhaps a counselor who could bring a third party perspective would help. Or even using a book or videos that would help him better understand that women also have sexual needs.
Since you know that you can achieve orgasm, you have assurance that you don't have a physical problem in that area. What seems to be lacking is common ground between the two of you, and common goals. The more that can be done to help him better understand what you need, the better.
I hope that helps. Please let me know, and best wishes to you.
December 5, 2009 - 2:05pmTake good care,
Pat
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