Many women have asked this exact same question, so you are not alone.
Please do not "blame" yourself, or try to convince others that you are worthy of your boyfriend's love and physical affection...of course you are, whether you are a runway model or "just" the girl-next-door.
If sex is not your boyfriend's priority, then what is? Is a healthy, happy and fulfilling relationship his priority? If so, how does he wish to achieve this with another person? These are the questions you need to ask him, as "sex" is not the issue here, but rather, his lack of communicating with you that his priorities have changed.
Please know that was is even more important than just sex is all forms of physical, mental and emotional intimacy...not just intercourse...that create a happy, healthy and fulfilling long-term relationship. If he is uninterested in all of these forms of intimacy, then is he interested in a friendship only (because, that is what he would have). He can not have the title of a relationship without putting in the work to create a loving partnership, which does include intimacy. This is where the conversation needs to start. It is OK if this is not what he wants any longer, but it is not OK for you to berate yourself for not being good enough to "seduce" him, and it is not OK for him to pretend to not know and dismiss the change in the relationship; it is both of your responsibilities to communicate openly, honestly and truthfully, and be authentic with yourselves and your needs...even if this means you two are on different paths.
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Many women have asked this exact same question, so you are not alone.
Please do not "blame" yourself, or try to convince others that you are worthy of your boyfriend's love and physical affection...of course you are, whether you are a runway model or "just" the girl-next-door.
If sex is not your boyfriend's priority, then what is? Is a healthy, happy and fulfilling relationship his priority? If so, how does he wish to achieve this with another person? These are the questions you need to ask him, as "sex" is not the issue here, but rather, his lack of communicating with you that his priorities have changed.
Please know that was is even more important than just sex is all forms of physical, mental and emotional intimacy...not just intercourse...that create a happy, healthy and fulfilling long-term relationship. If he is uninterested in all of these forms of intimacy, then is he interested in a friendship only (because, that is what he would have). He can not have the title of a relationship without putting in the work to create a loving partnership, which does include intimacy. This is where the conversation needs to start. It is OK if this is not what he wants any longer, but it is not OK for you to berate yourself for not being good enough to "seduce" him, and it is not OK for him to pretend to not know and dismiss the change in the relationship; it is both of your responsibilities to communicate openly, honestly and truthfully, and be authentic with yourselves and your needs...even if this means you two are on different paths.
October 27, 2009 - 8:47amThis Comment
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