I would love to echo Pat's feelings about how great you are doing in the spite of a major depression. I have suffered from depression and I know how hard it is to force yourself to do things like do your work and take a shower.
I, too, would be curious about the reasons to be prescribed the lithium, since you are not bipolar.
Is the generic zoloft the only medicine you have tried during this depression? Did it work for you before or is this the first time you have tried it? Have other medications worked for you before?
Is there an anxiety aspect to your depression?
Pat gave you wonderful advice about how to talk to your doctor. If it helps, print it out and take it with you. Understand that the depression's JOB is to KEEP YOU DOWN. It doesn't want you to laugh, enjoy things or understand things. It doesn't want you to work or play. Depression's major biochemical effect is to blunt our enjoyment of and participation in things, so we find ourselves cocooned on the couch in front of the television, or in the bedroom on the laptop. But every time you fight these inclinations, you are doing something good for yourself.
Since you work at home, I imagine you feel cloistered away from the world. Is that true? I know how difficult it is when getting out in the world is an effort. Some days go by when you never even leave the house; other times, when you do, it's a major chore. Getting groceries is a big deal. One of our HER writers, who has chronic fatigue syndrome, wrote about the life of those isolated with chronic illnesses, and how interacting with the grocery cashier or the postal clerk might be the biggest thing we do all week. It's true, and it makes it easier to stay at home in our safe place.
Keep fighting, Dunger. Keep getting out of bed, doing your work, and trying to get out of the house. Press your psychiatrist a little bit. Say, "After 13 months I should be feeling better. I'm not. Do we need to examine my medications? Do I need to be doing something else?"
And try to get SOME exercise, even a very little bit. Pat is right, it has a major positive effect on us when we have depression. If you can just make yourself walk around the block once today, that's huge. Then, keep it up. Maybe next week you can walk around two blocks. In one book I read, a doctor had his patient begin by exercising ONE MINUTE a day. That's all. She had to promise to deliberately exercise for one minute. He wanted her to do that for three weeks. His whole point was that it's not time or endurance that builds a habit, but repetition. You don't have to walk three miles to get the good out of a new bit of exercise and fresh air.
Is there anythng that you might be interested in in a volunteer manner? Working with animals at a shelter, perhaps, or shelving books at a library? (By the way, libraries are wonderful places to go when you are dealing with depression. Because they are open, they are free, they are filled with interesting people. You can browse, you can be quiet, but you can still feel that you are part of society.) Finding another external -- not internal -- reason to get out of the house can be crucial for those with depression.
Overall, though, please know that you're working hard and that it shows. You are fighting and it shows. All you can do is constantly take baby steps forward. When you don't want to get out of bed and you do it anyway, that's a victory. I am filled with admiration for all you manage to do and for your attitude.
Write back to us, tell us more about yourself. We're here, and we're interested.
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Dunger,
I would love to echo Pat's feelings about how great you are doing in the spite of a major depression. I have suffered from depression and I know how hard it is to force yourself to do things like do your work and take a shower.
I, too, would be curious about the reasons to be prescribed the lithium, since you are not bipolar.
Is the generic zoloft the only medicine you have tried during this depression? Did it work for you before or is this the first time you have tried it? Have other medications worked for you before?
Is there an anxiety aspect to your depression?
Pat gave you wonderful advice about how to talk to your doctor. If it helps, print it out and take it with you. Understand that the depression's JOB is to KEEP YOU DOWN. It doesn't want you to laugh, enjoy things or understand things. It doesn't want you to work or play. Depression's major biochemical effect is to blunt our enjoyment of and participation in things, so we find ourselves cocooned on the couch in front of the television, or in the bedroom on the laptop. But every time you fight these inclinations, you are doing something good for yourself.
Since you work at home, I imagine you feel cloistered away from the world. Is that true? I know how difficult it is when getting out in the world is an effort. Some days go by when you never even leave the house; other times, when you do, it's a major chore. Getting groceries is a big deal. One of our HER writers, who has chronic fatigue syndrome, wrote about the life of those isolated with chronic illnesses, and how interacting with the grocery cashier or the postal clerk might be the biggest thing we do all week. It's true, and it makes it easier to stay at home in our safe place.
Keep fighting, Dunger. Keep getting out of bed, doing your work, and trying to get out of the house. Press your psychiatrist a little bit. Say, "After 13 months I should be feeling better. I'm not. Do we need to examine my medications? Do I need to be doing something else?"
And try to get SOME exercise, even a very little bit. Pat is right, it has a major positive effect on us when we have depression. If you can just make yourself walk around the block once today, that's huge. Then, keep it up. Maybe next week you can walk around two blocks. In one book I read, a doctor had his patient begin by exercising ONE MINUTE a day. That's all. She had to promise to deliberately exercise for one minute. He wanted her to do that for three weeks. His whole point was that it's not time or endurance that builds a habit, but repetition. You don't have to walk three miles to get the good out of a new bit of exercise and fresh air.
Is there anythng that you might be interested in in a volunteer manner? Working with animals at a shelter, perhaps, or shelving books at a library? (By the way, libraries are wonderful places to go when you are dealing with depression. Because they are open, they are free, they are filled with interesting people. You can browse, you can be quiet, but you can still feel that you are part of society.) Finding another external -- not internal -- reason to get out of the house can be crucial for those with depression.
Overall, though, please know that you're working hard and that it shows. You are fighting and it shows. All you can do is constantly take baby steps forward. When you don't want to get out of bed and you do it anyway, that's a victory. I am filled with admiration for all you manage to do and for your attitude.
Write back to us, tell us more about yourself. We're here, and we're interested.
January 15, 2010 - 9:07amThis Comment
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