You explained yourself perfectly. Welcome to EmpowHer, and thanks so much for writing.
Like Rosa said, many men change when their wives or girlfriends become pregnant. It's a confusing time because all of a sudden, their lover and friend is pregnant with their child and going to become a mother! Everything is changing with her physically and with life in general. They are going to become a father, and it makes them see things differently.
Your boyfriend might be scared that he could hurt you and/or the baby. Or it may be that he's not used to seeing a pregnant woman and thinking she's sexy. Especially if this is his first child. Indeed, everything in both your lives is going through a big adjustment, and he's having some difficulty with that.
Realize that your hormones are going crazy right now, and that his are not.
Do you think that this is a temporary thing? Or are you worried that his use of the pornography is a bigger, longer-term problem? There is nothing wrong with looking at porn unless it hurts someone in the process; have you told him how you feel about it?
Here is a trimester-by-trimester guide to sex during pregnancy:
Do these help a little? I agree with Rosa; try not to feel rejected. It has more to do with the pregnancy than it does with you. But do try to talk about it. And, yes, congratulations!!!
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Anon,
You explained yourself perfectly. Welcome to EmpowHer, and thanks so much for writing.
Like Rosa said, many men change when their wives or girlfriends become pregnant. It's a confusing time because all of a sudden, their lover and friend is pregnant with their child and going to become a mother! Everything is changing with her physically and with life in general. They are going to become a father, and it makes them see things differently.
Your boyfriend might be scared that he could hurt you and/or the baby. Or it may be that he's not used to seeing a pregnant woman and thinking she's sexy. Especially if this is his first child. Indeed, everything in both your lives is going through a big adjustment, and he's having some difficulty with that.
Realize that your hormones are going crazy right now, and that his are not.
Do you think that this is a temporary thing? Or are you worried that his use of the pornography is a bigger, longer-term problem? There is nothing wrong with looking at porn unless it hurts someone in the process; have you told him how you feel about it?
Here is a trimester-by-trimester guide to sex during pregnancy:
http://www.webmd.com/baby/features/sex-during-pregnancy-is-it-safe
And if you scroll down in this article there is some advice on positions, and some comments from men:
http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/sexuality/a/sexinpreg.htm
Here's an article for dads-to-be on how their sex lives change:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_how-your-sex-life-will-change-as-a-dad-to-be_1291080.bc
And here's an article on their fears:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25707457/
Do these help a little? I agree with Rosa; try not to feel rejected. It has more to do with the pregnancy than it does with you. But do try to talk about it. And, yes, congratulations!!!
February 18, 2010 - 7:32amThis Comment
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