I want to thank you very much for getting back to me so quickly and giving me a kind and honest response. About ur insights on my friend, I think its very interesting what you said about her trying to stand up for me. I think ur right because she is an amazing friend, we have been best friends since preschool (no joke) and she would never do anything to hurt me. Im sure that is what she was trying do although I dont agree with the way she tried to do it at all.
About my boyfriend,
1 he is cheating- I thought about that and this scares me but I can honestly say without any doubt in my mind that I dont believe he would cheat on me. I know many women would say that im in denial or dont want to believe that but he has never given me any reason to believe he would cheat on me, and I trust him. Also as I said before he is a very very blunt person and he would tell me its over before he would cheat on me.
2. He is angry about something- This could be a possibility. I cant think for the life of me anything that he might be upset about.
3. Fear of commitment this one made the most sense to me. our relationship is different then the normal. I'm 20 years old and my boyfriend is 37. So there is a quite large age gap. I wanted to ask you if you think his age could also have something to do with it?? He knows that I would like to get married and have children someday. He on the other hand does not EVER want children, in fact he has had a vesectomy. He also has said that he is unsure about marriage, in the past he never saw himself getting married and that this could change and he is open to the possibility of marriage but is still unsure. He has told me that he feels marriage ruins every relationship and that what him and I have now is almost the same thing as marriage. Basically the only difference he see's between marriage and what we have is a piece of paper, so whats the point. I think he may think he is holding me back from something, and possibly that I deserve better then him. However, although I do want marriage and children in the future, I am very young and I want to enjoy my youth. I dont see myself settling down with any of that stuff for another 7-10 years and he knows that. I just feel that even though we may want different things in the future, If I have found someone that I love deeply then why would I throw away what we have because things might not work out in the future. I just want to live in the moment and enjoy what we have together now.
About the counseling idea, I do think this is a good idea however we are currently living pay check to pay check and I dont have any extra cash to be spending on counseling. I also have some medical problems and my parents have been helping pay for all of that so first priority is paying them back and unfortunatley I just cant spend the money on counseling currently. Which is why I seeked out this website and I am very glad I found it. Your help and the help of other women has helped alot. It helps me know that I am not the only one going through this.
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Dear Aimee,
I want to thank you very much for getting back to me so quickly and giving me a kind and honest response. About ur insights on my friend, I think its very interesting what you said about her trying to stand up for me. I think ur right because she is an amazing friend, we have been best friends since preschool (no joke) and she would never do anything to hurt me. Im sure that is what she was trying do although I dont agree with the way she tried to do it at all.
About my boyfriend,
1 he is cheating- I thought about that and this scares me but I can honestly say without any doubt in my mind that I dont believe he would cheat on me. I know many women would say that im in denial or dont want to believe that but he has never given me any reason to believe he would cheat on me, and I trust him. Also as I said before he is a very very blunt person and he would tell me its over before he would cheat on me.
2. He is angry about something- This could be a possibility. I cant think for the life of me anything that he might be upset about.
3. Fear of commitment this one made the most sense to me. our relationship is different then the normal. I'm 20 years old and my boyfriend is 37. So there is a quite large age gap. I wanted to ask you if you think his age could also have something to do with it?? He knows that I would like to get married and have children someday. He on the other hand does not EVER want children, in fact he has had a vesectomy. He also has said that he is unsure about marriage, in the past he never saw himself getting married and that this could change and he is open to the possibility of marriage but is still unsure. He has told me that he feels marriage ruins every relationship and that what him and I have now is almost the same thing as marriage. Basically the only difference he see's between marriage and what we have is a piece of paper, so whats the point. I think he may think he is holding me back from something, and possibly that I deserve better then him. However, although I do want marriage and children in the future, I am very young and I want to enjoy my youth. I dont see myself settling down with any of that stuff for another 7-10 years and he knows that. I just feel that even though we may want different things in the future, If I have found someone that I love deeply then why would I throw away what we have because things might not work out in the future. I just want to live in the moment and enjoy what we have together now.
About the counseling idea, I do think this is a good idea however we are currently living pay check to pay check and I dont have any extra cash to be spending on counseling. I also have some medical problems and my parents have been helping pay for all of that so first priority is paying them back and unfortunatley I just cant spend the money on counseling currently. Which is why I seeked out this website and I am very glad I found it. Your help and the help of other women has helped alot. It helps me know that I am not the only one going through this.
March 3, 2010 - 3:20pmThis Comment
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