First, I think it's cool that you actually could meet your boyfriend's ex and be warm toward her and she toward you. That's a pretty amazing thing.
But I, too, see your boyfriend's side. The two women who he perhaps has been most close to in his life collide in one afternoon -- it's like a nightmare, or something you'd see on a bad sitcom. He may have felt that you almost betrayed him, in a way. You and he are the "now" and he and she were the "then," and the collision of the now and the then was a little too much for him to take.
I think Susan gave you great advice. I would let the matter drop and give it more time. Don't put pressure on the sexual side of things -- that just makes it worse. Be yourself, and go back to all the things you and your boyfriend like to do together.
I too have been the new kid in town more often than I'd like. Finding friends isn't easy. Do you have a job? Is there a library close by? A university where you could take a class?
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Anon,
First, I think it's cool that you actually could meet your boyfriend's ex and be warm toward her and she toward you. That's a pretty amazing thing.
But I, too, see your boyfriend's side. The two women who he perhaps has been most close to in his life collide in one afternoon -- it's like a nightmare, or something you'd see on a bad sitcom. He may have felt that you almost betrayed him, in a way. You and he are the "now" and he and she were the "then," and the collision of the now and the then was a little too much for him to take.
I think Susan gave you great advice. I would let the matter drop and give it more time. Don't put pressure on the sexual side of things -- that just makes it worse. Be yourself, and go back to all the things you and your boyfriend like to do together.
I too have been the new kid in town more often than I'd like. Finding friends isn't easy. Do you have a job? Is there a library close by? A university where you could take a class?
February 23, 2010 - 8:47amThis Comment
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