I have spent an hour researching this matter, I am completely amazed how prevalent the issue I am dealing with is; my boy friend has lost interest in sex with me. He has actually improved some, which isn’t saying much, I have to initiate sex every time and it usually involves me performing oral sex and him using his hand to stimulate me…with no other foreplay not even kissing. I love him very much and do not want to live without him, and he says the same to me. He is extremely affectionate, takes very good care of me, and says he would do anything for me. He talks about our future and marriage but honestly I can’t even consider it unless the intimacy in our relationship improves. His explanation for his lack of interest is stress from work (it is major), his anxiety medication, and the fact that he gained 20+ lbs; he said he doesn’t feel good about himself and just doesn’t feel well in general. He assures me that it is not me, he tells me that he is attracted to me and doesn't want anyone else but it doesn’t help. I can’t help but take it personally and it makes me feel unattractive and worthless and inturn; angry, resentful and I’m begining to lose respect for him. I get a lot of attention from men (I am often told by men and women that I am beautiful, I am in very good shape and take care of myself) and have been tempted to cheat on him (but I am not promiscuos at all). He has mentioned that it bothers him when his friends joke that I am too good for him. Although, I am very attracted to him and he knows it. We have so much fun together, he is my best friend but I am sacrificing a big part of who I am to be with him and I am very distracted by my frustration with this issue. We have gotten in many arguments and I have ended our relationship many times but he always wins me back with the things he says and because honestly, I am lost without him. I do not know what to do…would I be wrong to leave him when he is already dealing with so much stress??? I am so conflicted, I honestly do not believe I am strong enough to move on-I am in love with him but what about my happiness and needs…idk? HELP!
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I have spent an hour researching this matter, I am completely amazed how prevalent the issue I am dealing with is; my boy friend has lost interest in sex with me. He has actually improved some, which isn’t saying much, I have to initiate sex every time and it usually involves me performing oral sex and him using his hand to stimulate me…with no other foreplay not even kissing. I love him very much and do not want to live without him, and he says the same to me. He is extremely affectionate, takes very good care of me, and says he would do anything for me. He talks about our future and marriage but honestly I can’t even consider it unless the intimacy in our relationship improves. His explanation for his lack of interest is stress from work (it is major), his anxiety medication, and the fact that he gained 20+ lbs; he said he doesn’t feel good about himself and just doesn’t feel well in general. He assures me that it is not me, he tells me that he is attracted to me and doesn't want anyone else but it doesn’t help. I can’t help but take it personally and it makes me feel unattractive and worthless and inturn; angry, resentful and I’m begining to lose respect for him. I get a lot of attention from men (I am often told by men and women that I am beautiful, I am in very good shape and take care of myself) and have been tempted to cheat on him (but I am not promiscuos at all). He has mentioned that it bothers him when his friends joke that I am too good for him. Although, I am very attracted to him and he knows it. We have so much fun together, he is my best friend but I am sacrificing a big part of who I am to be with him and I am very distracted by my frustration with this issue. We have gotten in many arguments and I have ended our relationship many times but he always wins me back with the things he says and because honestly, I am lost without him. I do not know what to do…would I be wrong to leave him when he is already dealing with so much stress??? I am so conflicted, I honestly do not believe I am strong enough to move on-I am in love with him but what about my happiness and needs…idk? HELP!
July 21, 2010 - 10:35pmThis Comment
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