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Hi Anonymous

I think you should discuss this with your obstetrician, and I promise you it won't be the weirdest question they've ever heard, so don't be shy.

My hunch is that anal sex would not be any different than other sex, as far ask risk to the baby. However, the pressure downward in your abdomen while pregnant causes most women to develop hemorrhoids, and the combination of new hemorrhoids and anal sex may be something you won't like.

As far as the desensitizing lube, I think it depends on what the ingredients are. If they use something like benzocaine or lidocaine, you have to keep in mind that anything you absorb will likely cross the placenta and the baby will be exposed as well. I'm sure the amounts of those drugs in the lube are small, but I do not know if that is safe for a fetus or not.

Please check with your obstetrician just to make sure this is okay. Possibly bring the lube with you, or a list of the ingredients. Thank you for your questions, and congrats on the pregnancy!