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I totally understand where you're coming from because I'm right where you are. I'm 55 years old and primary care-giver for my 85 year old mother. I've been married for 32 years. I feel like I don't have an identity. I haven't had a sexual relationship with my husband in over three years. According to him there's no problem! He won't own up to anything especially if he's the one with the problem. So apart from feeling so isolated and alone, there's my mother. I promised my Dad on his deathbed that I would look after her. So here I am, lonely,care-giver work, no fun... I'm like you , a bottle of wine, TV or computer... ESCAPE! I too have the tingly tongue. My guess is the acid from the wine. I know all the health hazards and dangers. Everyday I tell myself I won't drink. I can go for days and not drink. I save mine until night. I'm ready for bed and time to relax. Problem is, when I go to bed, I can't shut my mind off. With the wine, I close my eyes and I don't have to think any more! I want to stop, but I'm so miserable in my life...