CLand,
I am so sorry that you are feeling miserable, lonely and not able to enjoy your life right now. Taking care of a loved one is extremely tiresome, emotionally and physically draining, and honestly---there is little (or no) sympathy since you are not the one sick, and you are "choosing" this. ( say this word in quotes, because often times it is not really a choice the caregiver feels like they were able to make; it was not a volunteer position that they can quit at any time).
The articles above all have some common threads: find help for yourself, do not do it alone, do something you love and enjoy everyday.
On top of your caregiver burnout, you are having marital difficulties, and are feeling that your husband does not even care that there are problems in the marriage. He may also be feeling your stress, reacting to your burnout...he may have a physical problem as you suggested. Whatever the underlying reason, it is helpful to talk with a counselor about these stressful issues and hopefully find some resolutions, even if you need to go to the counselor alone at first. Hopefully your husband will join you at the counselor's visits, so you both can discover how to lead happier and more fulfilling lives together.
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CLand,
I am so sorry that you are feeling miserable, lonely and not able to enjoy your life right now. Taking care of a loved one is extremely tiresome, emotionally and physically draining, and honestly---there is little (or no) sympathy since you are not the one sick, and you are "choosing" this. ( say this word in quotes, because often times it is not really a choice the caregiver feels like they were able to make; it was not a volunteer position that they can quit at any time).
Caregiver burnout is real, and it is crucial to take care of yourself. First. Please read these articles for helpful advice and real information about how to help yourself, in helping your mom:
- Caring for your aging parents while avoiding caregiver burnout
- Are you a caregiver? Do you have caregiver stress?
- Coping with caregiver "victimhood"
- Are you a caregiver? Can you share your experience?
- Caregiver Stress: Impact of Chronic Disease on the family
The articles above all have some common threads: find help for yourself, do not do it alone, do something you love and enjoy everyday.
On top of your caregiver burnout, you are having marital difficulties, and are feeling that your husband does not even care that there are problems in the marriage. He may also be feeling your stress, reacting to your burnout...he may have a physical problem as you suggested. Whatever the underlying reason, it is helpful to talk with a counselor about these stressful issues and hopefully find some resolutions, even if you need to go to the counselor alone at first. Hopefully your husband will join you at the counselor's visits, so you both can discover how to lead happier and more fulfilling lives together.
January 25, 2011 - 11:22amThis Comment
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