Hello Rosa,
Thank you for your very thoughtful and insightful advice. My son is not allowed to watch any type of violent programs whatsoever. He does sleepover my in-laws and my father's house from time to time so I am hoping they haven't exposed him to any inappropriate television but I am going to follow up on that one. My husband does tend to raise his voice when my son is doing things he shouldn't be doing but he doesn't swear at him or degrade him in anyway but even still I do pull him aside and tell him to lower his voice and put my son in time out if he is acting inappropriately with that being said I am not a saint either I have seldom occasions where I do raise my voice slightly when he is being inappropriate. But neither my husband nor myself in anyway compromise his psychological, emotional, or physical well being. We in no way use physical contact as a means of punishment only time outs. And since he has started developing these recent fears I have incorporated some new things on my own to try and reassure him such as creating a feelings chart for everyone in the house, creating the 5 and 5 game where he gets to ask me any 5 questions and I will answer them and in return I get to ask him any 5 questions that he has to answer which is generally centered on how he is feeling and why and I have actually learned alot about what and why he is feeling the way he does, I have tried to have him practice relaxation techniques like deep breathing, playing soft music at night, and he uses a nightlight to help him sleep so I am trying like the dickens to help reassure him and I must say he seems to be 50-60 percent better. So this is why I am torn because if he sees this child psychologist will she only discuss some fears that he hadn't even thought of or will it serve the purpose of helping him I don't know? Is she just trying to get money out of us as I did tell her what the situation was and she agreed that it probably is a phase but without even a formal evaluation she is already telling me it will probably be at least 8-10wks. of session to "get a better grip on things" so is she in it just for the money or for helping him and obviously getting paid as well. Ugh I am so confused and speculative at this point. Thank you for listening. Any advice would be much appreciated!
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Hello Rosa,
January 11, 2012 - 7:12amThank you for your very thoughtful and insightful advice. My son is not allowed to watch any type of violent programs whatsoever. He does sleepover my in-laws and my father's house from time to time so I am hoping they haven't exposed him to any inappropriate television but I am going to follow up on that one. My husband does tend to raise his voice when my son is doing things he shouldn't be doing but he doesn't swear at him or degrade him in anyway but even still I do pull him aside and tell him to lower his voice and put my son in time out if he is acting inappropriately with that being said I am not a saint either I have seldom occasions where I do raise my voice slightly when he is being inappropriate. But neither my husband nor myself in anyway compromise his psychological, emotional, or physical well being. We in no way use physical contact as a means of punishment only time outs. And since he has started developing these recent fears I have incorporated some new things on my own to try and reassure him such as creating a feelings chart for everyone in the house, creating the 5 and 5 game where he gets to ask me any 5 questions and I will answer them and in return I get to ask him any 5 questions that he has to answer which is generally centered on how he is feeling and why and I have actually learned alot about what and why he is feeling the way he does, I have tried to have him practice relaxation techniques like deep breathing, playing soft music at night, and he uses a nightlight to help him sleep so I am trying like the dickens to help reassure him and I must say he seems to be 50-60 percent better. So this is why I am torn because if he sees this child psychologist will she only discuss some fears that he hadn't even thought of or will it serve the purpose of helping him I don't know? Is she just trying to get money out of us as I did tell her what the situation was and she agreed that it probably is a phase but without even a formal evaluation she is already telling me it will probably be at least 8-10wks. of session to "get a better grip on things" so is she in it just for the money or for helping him and obviously getting paid as well. Ugh I am so confused and speculative at this point. Thank you for listening. Any advice would be much appreciated!
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