I'm 23 and I have a boyfriend that is turning 29 soon. We've been together for almost six months now and we've been living together for a month and a half. We've known of each other for over 10 years though. When we first started dating it was hard for him to get "hard", I couldn't perform oral on him because it wouldn't get hard and I would get frustrated, I couldn't get on top because it wouldn't get hard. Finally after a few attempts it got hard but it was on his terms. I'm an extremely sexual person, I like to try different positions and different things but the thought of changing something and his penis possibly not getting hard again scares me. So basically I have to have sex when he wants the way he wants it or I'm not getting any. Now recently I've found a large selection of porn on his laptop and in the middle of the night when he thinks I'm asleep I find out he's watching that porn and masturbating to it or when I'm not home that's what he spends his time doing. So he'd rather masturbate than have sex with me, it's actually pretty heartbreaking. And to top it off (no offense) it's all African American females with big butts and I'm the complete opposite. I can't get in to sex anymore because his penis will not get hard all the way, he says let's try new things but if I suggest something he says no, he says he feels pressured by me to have sex and that the relationship shouldn't be just about sex. BULL. What man really thinks that? And now he tells me I suffocate him that he needs his space. I honestly love him to pieces but the fact that I can't start to play with him to have sex bothers me, the fact that I get turned down bothers me. And now he needs space? The list goes on. I need to be pleased too! I'm young and my sex drive is high, it's not even like I'm asking for it 10 times a day. At least one good time would be fine with me.
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Thank you and yes he makes me feel like I'm some kind of sex addict and as if it's a really big issue and I have tried to speak to him about it but he says it's me and I put too much pressure on the situation and I should be more understanding to his "issue" and then he goes on to say that's why I can't discuss these things with you because you don't understand. So sometimes I feel bad because I think maybe there could possibly be an issue but if he can get it up with porn than why not with me. Doesn't quite make sense.
January 17, 2012 - 5:11pmThis Comment