I feel like you are telling my story. I cry myself to sleep some nights because I want him so badly/and or it makes me feel so badly. I came from a 10 year relationship where he started using hard drugs and so I shut down-and didn't want to have sex when he was using-understandably. It's like sleeping with a stranger. But with this new relationship it had so much passion promise, and now I find myself shut down AGAIN afraid of rejection. I'm like "how the fu$& did I get here???" It's exhausting, infuriating, saddening, maddening, and the worst is it causes loads of resentment. I need that fire and that passion. A friend once told me if someone doesn't have it, you can't put it into them. And just because he's a great guy, doesn't mean he's great for you. It's sad because I love him and never want to hurt him. But I deserve more!
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I feel like you are telling my story. I cry myself to sleep some nights because I want him so badly/and or it makes me feel so badly. I came from a 10 year relationship where he started using hard drugs and so I shut down-and didn't want to have sex when he was using-understandably. It's like sleeping with a stranger. But with this new relationship it had so much passion promise, and now I find myself shut down AGAIN afraid of rejection. I'm like "how the fu$& did I get here???" It's exhausting, infuriating, saddening, maddening, and the worst is it causes loads of resentment. I need that fire and that passion. A friend once told me if someone doesn't have it, you can't put it into them. And just because he's a great guy, doesn't mean he's great for you. It's sad because I love him and never want to hurt him. But I deserve more!
September 4, 2017 - 11:00amThis Comment
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