Hello and welcome to EmpowHer,
I understand how perplexing his behavior may seem. Its best not to assume anything until you talk to him about it.
Make sure to use "I" statements instead of "you" statement in the conversation. For example instead of saying "You make me feel insure, because YOU won't have sex with me," say, "I feel insecure because I want to have intimacy with you and I'm not able to."
Using "I" statements may seem selfish, but it will actually decrease the chances of him feeling blamed and triggering defensiveness.
Make sure he knows how important physical intimacy is for me. Clearly state your needs. Give him to opportunity to express his needs, and be open to them.
If he wants to ignore the problem, it becomes time to make some big decisions about the future of your relationship.
I hope that helps, good luck!
Faith
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Hello and welcome to EmpowHer,
February 14, 2016 - 1:58pmI understand how perplexing his behavior may seem. Its best not to assume anything until you talk to him about it.
Make sure to use "I" statements instead of "you" statement in the conversation. For example instead of saying "You make me feel insure, because YOU won't have sex with me," say, "I feel insecure because I want to have intimacy with you and I'm not able to."
Using "I" statements may seem selfish, but it will actually decrease the chances of him feeling blamed and triggering defensiveness.
Make sure he knows how important physical intimacy is for me. Clearly state your needs. Give him to opportunity to express his needs, and be open to them.
If he wants to ignore the problem, it becomes time to make some big decisions about the future of your relationship.
I hope that helps, good luck!
Faith
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