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Boyfriend Ignoring Me.

By Anonymous October 28, 2011 - 10:14am
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Hey Im 16 and Im going through a lot at the moment. I dont know what to do. I live in Sydney- Australia. Ive known my boyfriend which turned EIGHTEEN on the 17/10/2011, For about 4 years and we've been together for nearly 1 year and 10 months. I lost my virginity to him. We have a lot of fights over small things such as, if i tell im going out or if i went outside somewhere his response will be like "oh ye good you'll then see all your other ex's and guy friends." which really upsets me. But most importantly, EVERYTHING started in september, about a month and half months ago. He started ignoring me shockingly. He used to chase after me like crazy before. But now he doesnt even bother he doesnt care about me, yet he still manages to have sex with me and tell me he loves me. We had a huge fight and broke up just before his birthday and he invited me to his party. I didnt go ofcourse, but I really wanted to be there with him. We talk now, just a bit like how are you , im fine , i love you, this and that. He recently started working at a bank and left school. He works full time and when ever i call him he says ' oh sorry hun im working tomorrow i cant talk for long". I told him i was very sick ( i have kidney problems) and he didnt care at all. I told him I went hospital, he still didnt care. HE continued to ignore me. On his birthday he came over my house and we spoke and made out. He wanted oral sex from me, i always refuse to do it. He said to me " PLEASE, PLEASE DO IT I'LL NEVER HURT YOU AGAIN I PROMISE". then i did. After that he ignored me for days, he hurt me by saying all these bad words like slut, asshole, idiot. He couldnt keep his promise.. couple of days after. I said to him "please dont hurt me , promise on your mums life" . and he did. NEXT day he hurt me again and swore at me, he couldnt keep that promise aswell.. couple days ago i said promise me again. AND this time i believed it . I sent him money to his account because he was hungry and had no money. He was nice to me. I thought we going be very good. UNTIL... Just today which is now, i called him around 6pm and said "please come over i miss you" he said to me " I told you i cant come today im working tomorrow" then i said ok. At 11:50pm i called him , i couldnt even say a thing he answered it was very loud, he was at the club. " Ill speak to you later!". He thought he hung up , but he didnt and he put the fone in his pocket. I listened to the voices and everything for 2 hours. Ive never had this feeling before, i seriously wanted to vomit. He spoke to all these girls and danced like crazy. after two hours of listening to him his fone hung up, i i think by accident. half an hour later, i called and spoke normal i said " oh how was it, did you enjoy it ? i hope you had fun.. did you speak to anyone?" his response was this " yeah i had fun, drank a bit, thank you darling and nah it was me and couple of boys, I PROMISE YOU I DIDNT SPEAK TO ANYONE".


my plan ;-
Meet up with him at 10am on Sunday , go to the beach have some fun, swim, eat and drink. At around 3pm I would ask him to come with me to a coffee shop and sit and drink coffee. At the table Im going to tell him everything, about, me knowing he spoke to all the girls and still lied to me.

Is this a good idea , or what can i do, to hurt him like he hurted me?? Please give me some ideas until sunday!

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EmpowHER Guest

thank you so much, muchly appreciated.

October 29, 2011 - 8:35am

Dear Anonymous,

Please do not waste your time on this boy anymore. He clearly doesn't care about you anymore and is only using you for his gain.

Not only does he sound like a jerk, but he is also emotionally abusing you-- names like slut, asshole, and idiot should never be tolerated from ANYONE.

Changing your plan to ignoring his calls and never seeing him again sounds like a much better idea to me.

Best of Luck,


October 29, 2011 - 6:25am
EmpowHER Guest

Hi I'm in my 40's and have myself as well as seen many friends go through this. Basically, he's keeping you around for the fringe benifits, but he is either seeing someone else or looking for someone else. You are the steady thing keeping him company until something better comes along. He could also be scared about you being sick and not know how to deal with it.
Don't waste anymore of your precious time on this man. Go have fun with your friends and have a good time. Confronting him about lying will only make him mad that you caught him. Just be brave ,although you will always have strong feelings for this man because he was the first , and move on.

October 28, 2011 - 11:13am
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