Do women smell different after menopause?

I understand a lot of what you wrote about. And I'm sorry, because it is hard & lonely & scary. I'm 53, & I actually look a bit younger than that. Most of my life I've identified more with people younger than me - not because I'm immature or perverted - just because I embrace whatever I like, which definitely isn't "old lady" stuff! That should be of no consequence these days, with people generally living longer & in better health longer, but unfortunately there are those who still go by stereotypes. I ended a 7 & a half year relationship in Jan. of this year with a guy who was 21 & a half years younger than me. (He pursued me when we first met.) The age difference did cause a lot of issues between us, but for a long time it felt like we could get through most that came up. (One biggie that could NOT be overcome was the way his family thought of me & treated me because of our age difference, even though we loved each other & had a lot in common.) Then 3 years ago I had to have a second bladder mesh surgery (incontinence issues from giving birth to 2 large babies when I was very young, & I'm a small female) & also a full hysterectomy (I was having long, painful periods, & endometriosis). After those 2 surgeries, sex was extremely painful for me. I went to quite a few drs & even tried physical therapy, vaginal dialators, estrogen creams, etc. But it just kept getting worse. I'm not going to have sex if it causes me pain, so of course this became a HUGE problem in my relationship. My "boy" friend became quite an ass to me, so I finally cut him out of my life completely. I've had BAD odor changes with sweat everywhere on my body, & still have fairly frequent hot flashes, & it is embarrassing. I have pretty much zero libido anymore, mostly because I associate sex with anxiety & pain, & then shame - because I feel like I have no control over the way my body functions since surgeries. I think if I could hook up with a caring & patient like-minded man closer to my age, I might be able to work through these changes in my body & enjoy sharing my life with someone. But until that happens, I'm staying single. It sucks, it's lonely, & it's depressing. But if I were to try to settle for less, I KNOW it would be much worse. I have been unable to work for 6 yrs & am on disability, so I don't even have a job to fill my days & give me a feeling of purpose & productivity. A big part of me was defined by being a mom, but my sons are grown & moved away, & I very rarely get to see them or my grandchildren. I just moved out of an apartment building that felt more like a prison, & am now renting a large house with 2 long-time female friends & one's pre-teen son. I love them all, but it is proving to be quite an adjustment for all of us living in the same house now. I think we will be okay, though. I wish for your sake that you had some caring females in your life right now. I think that is very important. I will add you to my prayers. I hope your life begins to change for the better, in many ways. Don't give up - you sound like someone I'D probably really enjoy being friends with, so I hope you will keep yourself open & that wonderful opportunities will come your way. Stay true to yourself, & God bless you. :)

Yep, I indeed know where you're coming from. I'm sixty and I began "feeling myself disappear" when I entered my fiftys, I am now all but gone. America is a very hard country to grow old in if you're a womam.

I would try this immediately if I didn't think it was a huge risk. I fear the hormones would just Stoke my cancer cells (metastic breast cancer for ten years). Having no estrogen sucks in more ways than I ever anticipated. I will ask my doctor. At some of int though, quality of life is going to win out over prolonged life. I just have to get the kids self sufficient. Then I want my body back, without strange smells, painful sex and bladder infections galore.

Thank you so much for your honesty. I'm just a little weirded out at the change in smells in so many places. I had that vaginal fishy smell for a while. Don't know exactly why it went away but that was such a drag while it lasted. I determined it had something to do with my husband not completely clearing out the sperm after ejaculation. That last little bit left inside would go fishy after a few hours. Then there was a transfer of whatever that bacteria was that multiplied in his body. I have him make sure he washes first and no more fishy smelly in my silk purse anymore! Now I have a thick, kind of medicinal smell to my urine that kinda reminds me of, back when I had babies, how a disposable diaper smelled first thing in the morning. I'll post that question separately, too. By the way, You Made Me Laugh, funny lady. I lived in the tropics for a few months and the little ants literally ate holes, overnight, in my dirty underwear. I never left them out again.

I commented just now, but it doesn't appear to have shown up, so apoiogies if it appears twice, :
I am 63, startec menopause 10 yrs ago, hate everything about it, prior to that i looked young, then a few months into menopause ppl started treating me differently, I v quickly looked years older. Last night heard myself described as an "old lady" even though I do my best to look young and dress youthfully, I do no want to look old, I like Japanese vocaloid MMD videos and would like to make my own, collect some of the figurines like Black Rock Shooter, etc, I have interests that only young ppl usually are interested in, not because I'm forcing myself to be interested in things like that, but because I just am naturally. I'm not interested in things that most ppl my age are interested in. I don't fit in anywhere, no longer look or smell the same so get treated differently, ppl treat me like a funny old eccentric woman instead of me, with my unique personality, all that is ignored, in the eyes of the world, I'm just 'old'. I hate it, have no friends, except one man years older than me fdwho treats me badly and he has strong interest in really young girls I recently discovered so don't even like being in his company but have had to rely on him for certain things becasue there is no one else, I have tried so hard to make friends, have sought help from so called professionals, can't walk properly anymore, try to walk fast but can't, i am terrified, have no one to rely on, want to enjoy life, nobody cares about me except me myself. I want to look like me again, not just like an old woman, even without all the obvious signs of age, there are obviously still giveaways, probably the way I walk , upper arms loose flesh, squared off jawline droopy eyes, old lady smell, even sweet candy vanilla type scents seem to end up as the old lady cologne smell. Nature is trying very hard to make me as unattractive as possible in every way possible because no longer fertile and heaven forbid anyone of the opposite sex should still be interested in a woman over 50 let alone over 60, not that I want anyone ,i don't, but the fact that from being seen as young and desirable , i went from that, to straight to being old and undesirble in the eyes of the world. it is all so depressing. i used to be told , if you think things are bad now, wait until you get older! it gets even worse then! I now know what they mean!

This is EXACTLY my problem! This is the first time I have ever heard anyone who explains it this way. I too had a favorite perfume which I still wear but receive no compliments anymore!