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I am 23 and this is my first proper relationship,its been three years,in the beginning i was cool and casual and not bothered and i was confident and thats why he fell in love with me. but then i became clingy,obsessed,i now have low self esteem and im not the same girl anymore.we are close to breaking point,he loves me but he cant take it anymore.if hes annoyed with me,he walks away and says he wants his own space but i start to panic and follow him around everywhere trying to get us to make up but it ends up making it worse and makes him more angry with me.
am i just immature or do i have some self esteem issues? i always think if he leaves me nobody will ever love me cos i love him so much..and this is making us both miserable because i want to be normal and happy.
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Haha i have 34b i wish mine were bigger.
February 16, 2011 - 2:45pmIve been putting cocoa butter on them alittle but i have a hard time sticking to things. I will hopefully stick to it by summer.
I know my boyfriend notices other pretty girls but he always tell me that he thinks im the prettiest girl. When a girl walks by he just looks right into my eyes and keep talking to me.
He tries to do sweet things to me when he sees another girl that i think is prettier then me.
He will try to make me feel better about it. We talked about it today and i felt alot beter about it. Try to sit down and have a good conversation about it. It realllyyy helps.
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Thank you for everything.
February 15, 2011 - 2:15pmI dont think i am sooo dependent on him that i absolutley couldnt live witout him but i would have a very hard time recovering from losing him if i ever did.
He tells me that he wouldnt leave me for another girl and he tells me that he loves me. But what i am scared of is a girl doing something to him and him liking it and wanting to be with her more then me and leaving me for her or cheating on me with her.
I trust him but i dont trust the other girls. Is there anything that you could help me with with that?
And also i have such low confidence is there anytjing that i can do to boost my confience and be okay with myself because i hate my body. I hate my looks and my personality. The thing that i am most self concious about is my stretch marks from puberty.
Is there anything you can help me with that i have meantioned above?
Anything you can tell me i would love to hear. Thank you so much<3
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I hate that feeling.
February 13, 2011 - 5:43pmI just wonder how my relationship would be if i didnt feel this way.
Me and my boyfriend have been together for 2 years and almost 4 months so i depend on him for a lot of things.
I dont know what i woild do if something happened to us.
That is why i am wanting and needing change and help so badly.
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Shell1403,
February 13, 2011 - 8:38pmHave you been to a psychologist, who can help?
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No i havent. I know i need the help.
February 13, 2011 - 9:28pmI dont want to payto go to someone but i knoW i will not be able to fix myself. I am going tothe doctor in april to talk to her about it and see who she refers me to.
If you have any advice for me anything at all i would love to hear it.
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You can do many things now to begin empowering yourself, and I'm so happy to hear that you will talk to your doctor about a referral.
Ways to begin empowering yourself:
1. Become more self-reliant. It is scary to feel that you are so dependent on someone, that you don't know what you would do without them...in a very literal sense. I am married, have two kids, am very close with my extended family...and all of these people in my life are my entire world! However, I am also confident to say that I could go on living without them, heaven-forbid anything were to tragically happen. There is a difference between being dependent on someone and having interdependent relationships. You want to be your own independent person, capable of being alone and happy first...in order to be a healthy and equally contributing part of an interdependent relationship.
2. Begin researching your options before your doctor's appointment, so you know the differences between psychologists, psychiatrists, etc. Know what your health insurance will pay, what your employer or student benefits are, and if a specific counselor in your area is highly recommended.
I hope this helps!
If you work or go to school, many companies or universities provide counseling services for free or minimal cost that you can look into (it is confidential).
February 15, 2011 - 12:11pmThis Comment
I have paranoia too! I hate going outside and when I walk i dont look at people in the eye,i get shy and look at the ground mostly and I hate when men look at me and shout things it embarrasses me
February 13, 2011 - 4:57pmgood luck to you also and i am here to talk aswell xxxx
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I have the same problem and need help.
February 13, 2011 - 9:50amDid you ever find help?
I feel im ruining my relationship too. Please please help me.
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Hi shell, no i am still obsessed,Im so scared of losing him that even when we have problems and he tries to break up with me cos he loves me but he says its an unhealthy relationship i dont let him,he tells me to leave and i keep coming back til he gives in.sounds horrible to other people but i cannot bear the thought of being without him.
February 13, 2011 - 10:52amobsession can stem from personality disorders, so often a person who is obsessed with a person can have other issues too,I have learnt that I have Bipolar and Borderline personality disorder too and I am currently on a waiting list to see a psychiatrist-i hope i can get the help I need, I suggest you go to your GP and tell them all your problems,the way you act,think etc, it might take a few attempts but ask them to refer you to a counsellor,they will see after a few times tht you obviously need help.
I really hope it works out for you and hopefully we can both move on from this and become more independant and happy with out lives xxxx
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I have paranoia. I am always scared someone is watching me and waiting to hurt me. I have read up on it a lot and i feel this is where my problems are coming from.
I hopefully will be able to find help when i go to the doctor in april.
Thank you for your advice. It is very much appreciated.
Good luck with your journey in recovery.
Im always here to talk if you need me because i know how you feel.
Thank you and good luck<3
February 13, 2011 - 11:28amThis Comment