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How to feel more comfortable with having sex?

By February 11, 2016 - 7:17am
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I'm considering having sex with my boyfriend - we've been dating for over a year, and it'd be my first time having it. However, I'm really paranoid about getting pregnant, and I think that fear is what's holding me back.
Honestly my boyfriend isn't pushing me into anything - he said he's willing to wait as long as I need to feel comfortable, and to use condoms and/or other means of protection. I recently just started the birth control pill too. I know with both a condom and the pill, if used correctly, there is practically no chance of pregnancy, but I can't help but worry hahaha. I fear that the worry will stop us from having a good time.

I think basically what I'm asking is how to feel comfortable with having sex, and to not be too tense or worried?
I'd really appreciate any tips or suggestions.

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Hello RK,

Thank you for reaching out to our community for advice about how to feel more comfortable having intercourse for the first time.

Fear of becoming pregnant is a legitimate concern. Taking your birth control pills consistently offers protection. The additional use of a condom by your boyfriend provides an extra level of protection.

Sexual interrcourse is as much a physical as an emotional act.

Set the mood so you are both relaxed, allowing time for foreplay and adequate lubrication, and you should be fine.

Sometimes, moral or religious beliefs can impede sexual intercourse. As long as you feel ready, and feel committed to your boyfriend, your first experience should be a good one.


February 11, 2016 - 9:27am
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