I am fearful of sex to the point where my husband of 40 years and I have intercourse maybe a few times a year. How can I get over my fear and be lubricated enough that it doesn't hurt. I am sure years of no estrogen treatments have added to my dryness. I am also on cymbalta for depression and to treat severe arthritis pain.
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I have found that the K-Y Liquibeads help a lot but I am still having pain when my husband goes in all the way. I am sure my lack of estrogen has ruined my life. I have also suffered from hot flashes for 15 years. When he is on me it triggers one. It is hard to find a comfortable position because I have had both knees replaced as well.
October 28, 2011 - 2:07pmThis Comment
Positions that keep you off of your knees and him off of you include side-lying positions. Try as many different positions while remaining on your side to avoid triggering hot flashes and knee pain. Here are some side-lying positions you can try, remember you can modify some of these to keep you comfortable: http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/side-sex-positions
Best,
Rosa
November 2, 2011 - 8:23amThis Comment
Hi Susiek24,
Thank you for your post!
I'm so sorry that you are fearful of sex due to your vaginal dryness. Instead of vaginal moisturizers, have you tried using a water-based lubricant? You may need something that is used right before sex and that gives you temporary but immediate results.
Try not to be scared-- I know it's easier said than done but usually fear itself will not allow you to enjoy sex. Just apply a liberal amount of lubricant and ask your husband to be gentle.
Hope this helps,
Rosa
October 27, 2011 - 8:54pmThis Comment