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I am having a low self-esteem day. Any advice?

By Anonymous March 10, 2009 - 12:17pm
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Hi, I'm in my mid-30s, and am just having one of those days. Not sure if it's hormonal or not...any tips on how to raise self-esteem when you're already feeling down?

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EmpowHER Guest

Sometimes the best thing is to just go on and embrace the feeling or feelings behind the low self esteem; be especially compassionate to yourself today; recognizing that self esteem ebbs and flows which is quite normal for women.
Tomorrow you may be flowing.

November 17, 2010 - 2:02pm
HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

I love your wise words Anon.

Too often we want everything fixed that doesn't need fixing. Of course if bad days turn into bad weeks that's a whole other story but good days and bad days are part of life and both should be accepted (and not "fixed:") because they are part of the natural cycle of life.

Embrace the occasional bad day - it's makes the good ones even better!

November 17, 2010 - 2:21pm
EmpowHER Guest

I always say your highest potential is found in your greatest suffering. People with low self-esteem is afraid of the capacity of their inner giant to change their lives. Low esteem is usually a sign that an altogether powerful and latent genius is being contained.Self Esteem Affirmations

November 17, 2010 - 12:07pm
EmpowHER Guest

The timing of your post is perfect. I'm sure there are 1,000's of women out there going through what you are going through especially given the economic times. I actually went through some thing similar a few months ago. I was having major problems with anxiety, and my self esteem and confidence could not of been lower. I'm 45 and this was the first time I had encountered this. I could not control the bad thoughts and anxiety. I'm in sales so this is the last thing I needed in my profession. I got in to my doctor and he prescribed an anti depressant which took about 4 weeks to kick in but now my confidence, and self esteem are better, stronger than ever. My anxiety is gone as well. I feel so good again. If you continue to battle with this you might want to see your doctor and see if he recommends an anti-depressant.

Good Luck and Good Health!

March 10, 2009 - 5:49pm

I love what Princeline said: "We all live in our heads." That is so very true!

My Grandfather used to say something like that, too: "You are what you think."

We all have those down days; it's normal. Try to figure out what brought on the blues. Was it the weather? "Some guy?" That time of month? Clutter around you? Stress or anxiety about things you can't control?

Do something nice for yourself that you would typically reserve for someone else. You're just as special and deserve to treat yourself well. Get comfortable and do something "brainless," like watch a funny movie, and put this downer day to bed. Get a good night's sleep.

Hope tomorrow goes better for you.

March 10, 2009 - 4:50pm

Do you remember the song "YOU ARE MY SUNSHINE", well right this minute someone would LOVE to hear from YOU and YOU will brighten their day...if you can't think of a friend, or family member to call or go see then try reading more of the amazing stories here on EmpowHER and all a comment...or how about taking a nice walk in this beautiful day (I'm in Phx, sunny bright and perfect for getting some Vit. D). Remember that saying "GOD didn't create any CRAP".....We all live in our heads, I was once told that our brain is our living room...so move some thoughts around! As another song said "Accent the POSITIVE"!

March 10, 2009 - 3:26pm

I'm sorry to hear this!

EmpowHer has a great article on this very topic: Loving Yourself: How to Raise Your Self-Esteem".

A few tips from this article:
- If you are being self-critical today, then you have permission to TALK BACK TO YOUR INNER CRITIC! Replace negative self-talk and thoughts with the positive
- "True self-esteem comes from within, from mastering new tasks, knowing your strengths and weaknesses and keeping friends...", to name a few.
- Do you have a friend or family member that you haven't spoken to in a while? Make a date with them tonight to talk on the phone and catch up. A social-networking site could also be helpful (ie, Facebook), if you are feeling lonely and wanting to re-connect.
- Do you have time to think about "mastering a new task", whether it be accomplishing something you've been procrastinating on? Spend an hour this evening cleaning out a small closet, working on your taxes, paying bills,
- What are your strengths and weaknesses? It sounds like you already know what your weakness is, during your low self-esteem day. You can try journaling for an hour tonight, and write 1-2 weaknesses that you are feeling, and then write about what you are good at. It might give you some perspective!
- Get active: take a walk, play with your kids, go to a bookstore and pick up a magazine that makes you happy, try a new healthy meal.

Just a few ideas! I hope you feel better, soon!

March 10, 2009 - 12:27pm
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