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My boyfriend wont have sex with me anymore

By Anonymous May 2, 2010 - 11:21pm
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well my boyfriend of a yr wont have sex with me anymore always have a funny answered when questioned about it and it hurts if i touch his penis he said that feels funny or stop what u doing silly or he pushes me hand away i can be half naked we wont try anything on me, today when asked whats the problem he said im uncomfortable when u touch me there it doesnt feel right? what is that? he has cheated on me with his ex and i have found emails from them he told me he doesnt want her and that hes leading her on but really who the hell knows. One day hes sweet and holds me kisses me the next nothing and if i go to kiss him he moves his head or gives me a sad story about french kissing pls help me

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HERWriter Guide

Dear Anonymous

Thanks for your question and welcome!

My response is that of "oh dear," I'm afraid.

Your boyfriend is refusing sex or any kind of intimacy and has cheated on you with his ex. He also admits he is "leading her on" and is clearly still in contact with her.

Anon, I don't believe in ultimatums. Telling him what he has to do or else you'll leave may be a waste of time since his actions tell you that he's going to do whatever he wants, no matter how it makes you feel.

All relationships can work if both parties want them to, but in your case it sounds like only one of you is making any effort.

It's time to tell him that his behavior is unacceptable. And when he cuts all contact with this person, that perhaps you are both work through this. If you are both young and without children, I recommended you take a break from this relationship. Re-evaluate how you expect to be treated by a man. If cheating and lying and constant sexual rejection is ok with you, then stay with him.

But I'm pretty sure you have higher standards, right? Think long and hard before you continue with a man who has his girlfriend and ex-girlfriend on a holding pattern of his design. You deserve more.

Will you update us?

May 3, 2010 - 11:41am
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