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Painful Sex

By Anonymous September 10, 2015 - 1:07pm
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I have a problem that has been going on since March of this year. I have been married for 2 1/2 years, but sexually active for about 4 years. During those years sex was never painful and I never used lubrication during sex because my own lubrication was always enough. Then this March I got a yeast infection and Bacterial Vaginosis. Sex was painful because of those infections. However, treatment I still had the same extreme burning sensations during sex and could not do it. So they treated me for inflammation of the uterus. The treatment took 2 weeks and I did not have sex during that time. I was also tested for STD's and everything else in the book and all those tests were negative.

Ever since March after treatment, sex has been tolerable at times, but most of the time the burning is horrible. I am also very dry and do not produce much lubrication was is the exact opposite of how it used to be. It is really taking a toll on my marriage because of it. I simply endure the pain now because I don't know what else to do.
Today however, when I had sex the pain was so bad it lasted for hours even after we finished. I could barely walk. I do not have any infection or anything visible wrong, so the doctors told me to just use a water based lubrication. But no matter how much lubrication I use, it still burns like hell. What can I do??

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Hi Anon,

Thank you for sharing your question with the EmpowHER community.

In addition to what your doctor recommended, you and your husband may be able to reduce or minimize the painful intercourse (Dyspareunia), further by making a few changes in your routine.

  • Switching position - If you are on top, this gives you more control to regulate the penetration, etc.
  • Communicate  - Explain to your husband what feels okay and what doesn't.  Guide him to slow down, etc and work together to improve the overall experience for both of you.
  • Longer foreplay - This will stimulate your natural lubrication and will enhance the lubrication your doctor recommended.  Being fully aroused before penetration, can minimize the pain as well.

Exploring other avenues of intimacy (sensual massage or mutual masturbation) can help and fun as well.

I hope this helps.

Be well,


September 10, 2015 - 2:24pm
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