Facebook Pixel

PLEASE HELP. My bf preferes large breasts and doesnt want to have a sex with me

By February 27, 2015 - 9:50pm
Rate This

I am dating my boyfriend over a six months now. I was the one who initiate a first move in the bar where we have met and gave him my number. After few months it slipped through his mouth that he likes girls with large breasts and mostly all of his girlfriends had really big ones. Well I felt like shit because my ones are 34A but tried to deal with that by myself. He said he wouldnt mind and would like me to get breast implants but that it is not mandatory to him. My breasts have really nice shape, my exes always liked them. I have a great round ass and I have always dated ass guys. So they were always crazy about my ass especialy in the bed. I can really say the difference of how my exes were horny about me and how my current boyfriend is. He doesnt have problem with errection during sex but his sex drive with me is very low to what I would prefere. Last three months it is usualy me who initiate sex. Usually he tells me not to touch him and that he is not in the mood for sex. He wants to sleep with me like maximum once a week. On the other hand even though he doesnt want to sleep with me he enjoys doing oral sex and other things for me. Am so horny when I am with him and it makes me frustrated. To sleep with him more than once a week I have to try hard to turn him on. About his feelings. He really fell in love with me and it shows. He can be quite jellous of others guys that are chasing me. He tells me how sexy I am and the fact that he is not in the mood for sex has nothing to do with me and that he likes being with me even if we dont have sex. Anyway it is really hard for me to be in that kind of relationship. When he didnt want to have sex I have asked him if he masturbated that day or the day before. Usualy he said yes. Which means he has a sex drive but not with me. I asked him if is it because of my breasts size and if he watched such a videos. He said he masturbates to random videos and isnt bothered about breast size. Also said to me he preferes real sex than masturbation because orgasm is better. I asked him if he could maybe next time wait for sex with me instead of masturbation and he said yes. Anyway this week again no mood for sex. So I checked his browsing history and he was looking at videos of really large breasted porn star Katee Owen. This all really hurts me and dont know how to deal with fact that I am not his type and that he doesnt want to have sex with me. A was always so attractive to my exes and even now there are guys crazy about me. I really dont know what to do and fell like I have to break up with him because I cant handle this.

Add a Comment2 Comments

I would let him go because if he really does like big breasted women and you don't have that quality, it will always come between you and if you got an implant just to satisfy him, you will bear a grudge and the implant may not suit you.
It feels to me like you're flogging a dead horse and getting nowhere except frustrated.
Try again with someone else. Out there is someone who thinks you are just perfect! Go before you lost faith in yourself.

March 3, 2015 - 2:50am

Hello and thank you for sharing your question with the community.

I would like to share with you a very useful insight from Shari Harley's book "How to Say Anything to Anyone."  

Each person in a relationship has an idea of what they expect from the other person.  These expectations are rarely discussed, and inevitably when one of the persons breaks or goes against the expectation of the other, problems arise.  This is exactly what is happening between you and your boyfriend.

Since you did not tell him your expectations at the beginning, he will feel criticized if you tell him at this point after he has already "mess-up".  So, I suggest that you go about it this way: 

1. Instead of telling him what he did wrong, tell him what you would like or expect of him.

2. Be prepared to express your needs more than once.

3.  If he does not wish to fulfill your expectations, you now have the liberty to tell him, since you already laid out what those expectations are.

4. If he still does not wish to fulfill your expectations, you have 2 decisions to make.  You can either compromise by coming to a new agreement with each other, or let him go.

The concept of communicating your exact needs and expectations may feel awkward at first but it gives the other person a chance to be successful in the relationship.

I wish you all the best.


February 28, 2015 - 12:38pm
Enter the characters shown in the image.
By submitting this form, you agree to EmpowHER's terms of service and privacy policy
Add a Comment

All user-generated information on this site is the opinion of its author only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for any medical conditions. Members and guests are responsible for their own posts and the potential consequences of those posts detailed in our Terms of Service.

Sex & Relationships

Get Email Updates

Resource Centers

Sex & Relationships Guide

HERWriter Guide

Have a question? We're here to help. Ask the Community.


Health Newsletter

Receive the latest and greatest in women's health and wellness from EmpowHER - for free!