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Is this the start of the menopause?

By May 28, 2016 - 1:30am
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I'm 44yo, with unexplained infertility. All my life I had a 28-day cycle, with very light 2 days menstruating. After years of trying to conceive, I found out that I do not ovulate. Many years ago I tried Clomid but still didn't ovulate and due to me getting older, they said there was nothing else they could do and advised me to take contraception and anti-depressants to sort it out. Which I didn't do.
Last year I started having heavy periods, period pains for the first time and quite bad mood swings, then my cycle has slowly changed to 36 day cycle with 5-6 very heavy menstruating days. Last cycle I started menstruating on day 24 but it was very light and lasted 2 days. I have been very emotional since. I'm now currently on day 8 of my cycle and for the last few days, I've had mild period pains, then last night very light bleeding. Today the pains are worse and I'm feeling terrible.

So my question is, is this the start of the menopause? I can't go to my GP as her answer to everything is anti-depressants.

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HERWriter Guide

Hi doll653

Thank you for your post!

Most doctors are great but yours isn't. To think anti-depressants are the answer for everything is nonsense especially since your issue is physical. Nothing worse that a pill-pusher when what you need is an actual solution.

Anon, have you been test for polycystic ovaries? PCOS? This could be the cause of your lack of ovulation.

Read more on that here: http://www.empowher.com/polycystic-ovarian-syndrome/content/polycystic-ovarian-syndrome-pcos

About what's going now - it does sound like you may be in peri-menopause - this is time before menopause (that can last up to a decade!) where women see changes in their cycles and start to feel differently. Maybe feel bouts of depression or blues, where they don't sleep as well as they used to. Skin and hair gets dryer. Period cycles can get a lot longer or shorter and bleeding can be erratic - sometimes lasting 10 days, sometimes only two or three. A women is in menopause when she has not had periods for 12 straight months.

Read more on peri menopause here: http://www.empowher.com/condition/perimenopause

Let us know what you think and if you can switch doctors - do.


May 28, 2016 - 8:40am
(reply to Susan Cody)

Hi Susan, thanks for your reply.

I was under a gynaecologist at my local hospital trying to get help, and had a few tests done, I don't have PCOS. They put it down to unexplained infertility and I was discharged. I asked my gp to follow it up and find out why, which is when she advised me to take contraceptives.

After reading up on perimenopause symptoms this evening, I'm worried I may be at an early stage but haven't had any of the other symptoms except for the ones mentioned above.

I haven't really thought about changing gp's as I live in a small town and would have to travel to see a different one, but it is a really good idea. I genuinely think my gp doesn't think there is anything physically wrong with me, hence anti-depressants. I'm usually quite a happy, optimistic person, the problems I've been having with my cycle has been getting me down. I'm finally understanding what pms is, its a difficult experience to start suffering from in my mid-forties.

Thank you
Doll ღ

May 28, 2016 - 1:23pm
HERWriter Guide (reply to doll653)

Hi Doll

I understand it's not easy to change doctors. But it might be worth it to get someone who listens to you rather than listens to whatever sales reps are telling her.

It's ok to be in the early stages of perimenopause - most women are when they're in their mid 40s.

Are you worried as you are still hoping for a child?


May 28, 2016 - 3:06pm
(reply to Susan Cody)

Hi Susan,

Thank you for your reply.

I am very worried, having a child has been my dream and its something I just can never give up on. My life has been empty without children and I think now, with what's happening, my future is going to be empty too. I've never found anything to fill that void.

Thoughts of early stages of perimenopausal are quite devastating to me, as I feel like my body is giving up the chance of ever becoming pregnant.

I think registering at a new gp is the way to go, I should have done it years ago. Though after the reading up I've done on it over the last couple of days, there is nothing a new gp can do for me anyway.

I've really appreciated the help and advice, thank you so much.

Doll ღ

May 29, 2016 - 8:56am
HERWriter Guide (reply to doll653)

Hi Doll

You sound very compassionate and I understand the biological longing for a child. It's very normal, it's part of our DNA.

Would you consider IVF? Do you have the money for it? My sister-in-law had her one and only baby at almost 46, an IVF baby. Healthy as a horse and cute as a button! Her pregnancy was very healthy. Consider it if it's very important to you.


May 30, 2016 - 1:09pm
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