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Vaginal dryness: can't get wet and i'm only 26

By September 20, 2010 - 9:34pm
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I don't get aroused easily and can barely get an orgasm. I enjoy it but less and less since I'm always so dry I get hurt. The vaginal lips will bloat when I get aroused but I barely get wet and it doesn't get better. I can go for one round, I'm too dry after and no amount of foreplay will get me there, not even masturbation. And I ALWAYS have some kind of tear tissue in the area, either right below the vagina entrance, at the entrance or both. and next day feels uncomfortable.

I wasn't like that till my 23rd bday and I can't find what's wrong. I'm also prone to yeast infection (like white cheesy discharge, no odor and lots of itching)
Is there a solution besides lubricant?

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EmpowHER Guest

I am a 25 year old woman. I can get wet but my problem is that it never lasts. I can only go one round then I have to stop. Then I can't play Again for about a day or two. I have the nexplanon in my arm. I have live with this dryness since I had my second child. I was wondering if there was anything I can do to help

July 11, 2017 - 12:27am
EmpowHER Guest

I've been sexually active since I was 13 and I use to get EXTREMELY WET and at about age 15 I went to a all girl detention home for about 2 years.Now if someone kisses my neck I barely get aroused but I'm horny and my turn on spot is the back of my arm or I can only self lubricate if I'm watching extreme or gay porn no amount of foreplay works except oral sex. What happened to my body.

June 18, 2017 - 12:09am
HERWriter Guide (reply to Anonymous)

Hello Anon

This question isn't possible to answer by us - it's sounds like a therapist can help.

June 19, 2017 - 6:31am
EmpowHER Guest

Help! I'm only 22 years old and I can't EVER get wet! I used to get extremely wet very easily, but ever since I took a plan B pill over a year ago, I haven't been able to get wet. Does anyone know anything about this?

June 9, 2017 - 7:00pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to Anonymous)

I am going through the same thing. I noticed I progressively got dryer after either taking the plan B pill or getting an abortion when I was 18. I used to get easily wet to the point that I was dripping and now even when i masturbate I don't get wet. It can't be that I don't trust my sexual partner. I'm masturbating lol. I hate it and I don't know what to do.

June 10, 2017 - 7:36am
EmpowHER Guest

I get wet when we flirt over text or at a restaurant. Even thinking about it gets me wet. However when it comes to any kind of physical contact, either my boyfriend trying to stimulate it or I try to masturbate, it gets really dry and the skin feels sensitive. And his thing will never get inside. He's never penetrated anything more than two fingers inside. It gets very slightly wet after a lot of penetration with fingers. Ps: in a very serious relationship with this guy.

May 28, 2017 - 8:42pm
EmpowHER Guest

Ok I have the same problem. I have had this going on since I was around 30 and am now 40. I am in a loving relationship and we have alot of for play bUT it's not enough. I'm either dry or not wet enough. I cannot use any type of lubricant (even high end ones). I get yeast infections for everything. When I talked to the doc.....several times they just tell me more foreplay. My brain is aroused but my body is not.

August 18, 2015 - 7:26am

The solution is dependent on the cause of your vaginal dryness.

I have a few follow-up questions for you:
1. Are you sexually active with one partner (reason I'm asking: is this a person you trust, or is your brain telling you that this is not the person for you, and it is manifesting itself physically by you not being aroused enough to produce lubrication?). Many times, sexual problems arise from the first point of sexual arousal: our brains and emotions. I just wanted to make sure you are having sex with one partner whom you love and trust with no deep issues, or you are having sex with multiple partners and being safe and happy with this. If you are emotionally and mentally OK with your sexual partners, then you can move on to the physical aspects.
2. Physically, you said you are unable to self-lubricate, and this has happened within the past 3 years. What happened, or changed, when you were 23?
3. During the sex act, are you able to tell your partner to slow down? Do you feel your voice is heard, and you don't feel pressure to perform? Do you feel guilty for not being "wet enough" from a few times, and now you are scared that you are not wet enough and it prevents you from becoming fully aroused?
4. You mentioned there is some feeling of tearing after sex. You probably want to use store-bought lubrication if you choose to have sex, as your body may begin to associate sex-with-pain, and it will be more difficult to self-lubricate. Does that make sense? Use lubrication liberally so that sex is not painful; your body is not "bracing" itself for intercourse, and you can hopefully physically relax more, which can lead to more self-lubrication.
5. Recurrent yeast infections might mean that they are not being properly diagnosed and treated. You would want to make sure you are infection-free before continuing any sexual relations, as your partner may also be spreading the infection back-and-forth. Have you been diagnosed with the specific type of infection?

If, after all of this, you are still not self-lubricating, you should talk with your doctor. Do you have a Gynecologist that you trust?

September 21, 2010 - 12:45pm
(reply to Alison Beaver)

Thank you for answering....A little bit of everything. I was in an abusive relationship and most of the time I feel like I'm not able to defend myself, so i'm shyer as time past by, causing me to stress. vicious cycle and when I'm thinking now i'm ok, turns out i'm not. 3 years later. :-S
and every time I ask a doctor about that, answer i got is every woman is different. Agreed, but i was not like that, so.

September 21, 2010 - 10:40pm
EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous (reply to tu.exito)

I'm thinking stress plays a role in vaginal dryness, just as it plays a role in mens sexual problems. A little therapy may help anyone in this situation. Also relaxing, being at ease and an understanding partner could help alot. U only get aroused when ur enjoying sex if u are bored or not that in to it then u wont get erect or wet. Im not expert but thats just from my own experiences. Hope it helps someone. :)

August 4, 2015 - 12:39am
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