ask: What does it mean when a girl gets wet from sex or being turned on? What happens if she isn't wet? It hurts to have sex and not be wet, is there something wrong?
Everytime I am having sex I always seem to be very wet, and sometimes wet through my panties. However, I met this new guy, really great!! I like him a lot and we stepped into that next level of having sex with each other. I did get an orgasm and it was enjoyable, but I was not wet and it eventually started to hurt mainly from dry skin rubbing against dry skin. Does this mean that I am not attracted to him? Is there a problem? Is there a way to fix this?
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Hi,
Your first question, what does it mean when a "girl gets wet" sounds like you already know, but it is a natural/normal part of a women's arousal, and her vagina becomes lubricated. And, as you experienced, this is typically a good thing, because sex without lubrication is painful!
You described that you have vaginal dryness with your new boyfriend. This has many causes or reasons, including:
- not being aroused enough before sex
- not wanting to have sex (your body might know something your mind doesn't want to admit?!)
- having sex before you are ready
- stress
- medications
What can you do about vaginal dryness? Depends on why you have vaginal dryness, especially if this is a new experience for you. Be honest with yourself, and if you/your boyfriend are having sex before you are ready, then slow down. If you two are having intercourse before you have had enough foreplay and are adequately aroused, then slow down. If you are worried about not liking him enough, then (you guessed it!) slow down. :)
However, if you think it is a case of nerves, stress or any new medications, then have you tried a sexual lubricant? There are many types on the market, some are flavored, some are different colors, some even heat up with friction...you can make it fun!...and there is nothing wrong with using it. Many couples use lubricants when using condoms (which I would HIGHLY recommend using condoms with a new boyfriend!!).
Some water-based lubricants on the market (buy at any drugstore) include astroglide or K-Y.
Does this help?
The main thing is that you are comfortable and enjoying your sexual experiences. Having sex when it is painful can have adverse effects (some women experience vaginal dryness more often because their bodies "recall" painful intercourse). I hope your boyfriend would not want to have intercourse if you are experiencing pain, also. And please know, what you are experiencing is normal and not unusual at all! It's sometimes scary and intimidating (and exciting) to have intercourse with a new partner, so just listen to your mind and body, and practice safer sex.
April 14, 2009 - 12:11pmThis Comment
I just recently began having sex with a new partner, and while it is enjoyable for him it is painful for me. He does oral and everything on me first and it is enjoyable but I cannot get wet enough for sex to be enjoyable. I really like the guy and feel very comfortable with him and I don't think that that is the problem. I have also come to notice that during masturbation I can actually orgasm still without getting wet, that seems weird to me. I feel uncomfortable with the idea of lubricant because I am only 18 and don't feel like I should need it. Do you have any recommendations?
June 24, 2009 - 7:03amThere's nothing wrong with you. Try the lubricant and save yourself the physical aggravation.
June 24, 2009 - 5:16pmYour age has more to do with it than you think. For many young women vaginal dryness is usual you really arent at your sexual peak. I had that problem more when I was younger, and rarely have that issue now, that I am in my thirties. Ky makes a vaginal lubricant bead that you can insert and works for up to 4 days so you can put it in hours before you are going to have intercourse, for deiscretion. Relax dont worry so much!
February 20, 2012 - 4:35pmUm what does lubricant mean plz dont call me stupid
July 12, 2009 - 8:58amThere is never a stupid question. Women naturally are lubricated while they are sexually aroused but there are times where an outside source can be helpful when arousal is not at its peak.
Sexual lubricants can be purchased at the store. Most stores carry KY Jelly but there are also different kinds of lubricants that can be purchased from sex stores that are water based, oil based and so forth. You would use the lubricant on the penis or vaginal area to help with causing less friction.
Check out this website from About.com that offers different lubrications. The kind you chose is clearly based on preference. http://sexuality.about.com/od/sextoys/a/lubricants.htm.
I hope this helps.
July 12, 2009 - 9:11amlubricant is this cream that u put on a man penis and it makes it slippery or like that u can pick it up at any store almost.
August 15, 2009 - 4:48pmI just recently was having sex with my boyfriend and I was very turned on/wet, which is normal for me to get overly wet sometimes I need to wipe some off so it is more enjoyable, but this particular incident what wasn't normal for me was it was white rather than a clear color. How normal or abnormal is this? I haven't had any itching or burning sensations. I'm completely embarrased PLEASE HELP
September 11, 2009 - 3:01pmwell this does mean that eaither its ur first time and the skin is starting to strech and if its white u have been cumming cs of all the plesure/wet dont worry about it ull be fine
October 5, 2009 - 6:22amVaginal discharge can be either white or clear; both are normal.
You are right that if there is any itching, burning or foul smell, then this would mean that there may be an infection that you would want checked by a doctor.
January 3, 2010 - 7:57am