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What is his problem???? HELP

By Anonymous January 18, 2012 - 7:39pm
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Okay so my bf and I have been together for almost 5 years. We have lived together for 1 1/2 years. We are both extremely happy in our relationship, trust each other, laugh together all the time and support each other. We talk about kids and marriage and he even recently took me to look at rings.

The problem is that he rarely wants to have sex or initiates sex. In the beginning like in most relationships, we had sex a lot. He's not overly affectionate but tells me that he loves me multiple times a day. He works long hours and is often tired, so I do take that into account. In the past year hr has rarely initiated sex and has flat out turned me down quite a few times. I almost always initiate it but if I'm lucky I get it once a week, it's more often once every two weeks. If even that maybe ever once a month or no times a month.

It's extremely frustrating and is messing with my self esteem. I'm 25 & he is 30. I have gained some weight since the beginning of the relationship, but am dedicated to working out and eating right after I left a job that didn't allow that. I am very attractive and still get hit on all the time. He is also attractive and had lost weight and then gained some back. I'm always telling him that I think he is hood looking, sexy, hot etc

So why doesn't he want to have sex with me?!?!?! It makes me really upset abd makes me feel horrible about myself. He doesn't understand when I try to explain. I don't really know what to do!

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EmpowHER Guest

Hi Anon,
Welcome to EmpowHER.  Sorry to hear this.  Many things can be causing this lack of desire for sex.  Are you aware if he is cheating.  If you are, then it can also be a low libido.  The only way to know is seeing a doctor and having blood work done.  He might also suggest counseling. 


January 19, 2012 - 6:35am
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