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why doesnt my feiance want to have sex with me anymore?

By August 3, 2010 - 11:56am
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me and my partner have been together nearly two years now, we live together and are engaged. for the first 6 monhs to a year we had sex all the time some days we could do it 3 times but it was at least once every day.
we havent had sex in a month and a half and the time before that was 3months. whenever we get the opatuinty to have sex he always makes up excuces ive got a sore head, i feel sick, im tired, im too drunk, its to late its to early. i dont no what to do im no asking for much just a bit more often than we are. ive told him how i feel and he just said stop beig silly were fine. quite clearly were not though were a young coupple we should be doing it once a week. we get on so well but we went through a faise of arguing non stop i thort we was on the edge of braking up but were past that now and are back to normal us but still no sex. ive tryed lots of stuff i read on the internet dressing up taking kinky pics sending them to him and phoning him telling him how much i want him while hes on his way home but when he got in he just went strate to bed watched tv then fell asleep leaving me laying there dressed up unsatisfied and feeling shity. i left it for ages i didnt try it on with him at all but went to bed with silky smooth legs nice undies and just a top but that went on for 3 months without any reaction.

i no hes not cheating on me and i dont want you to tell me to leave him i just want some advice on how to be super sexy make him look at me and go wow without looking like a slut or like ive been getting ready all night.
Hollie Xx

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HERWriter Guide

Hi Hollie!

Thanks for your post! Unless there is abuse going on, we never tell anyone to "leave" their partners. That is their ultimate decision.

However, I think you are going down the wrong path by thinking that wearing something sexy or being sexy will get your relationship back on track again. Since you have tried and failed with that, don't use it as a tactic again.

Men rarely stop having sex because their partner is not wearing lingerie and sexy bras. As long as a woman is clean, smart and sweet, they're on for it!

So it's ok to put your clothes back on and work on getting to the root of the problem. It could be anything from depression or a physical illness on his part, or he wishes to move on from the relationship and doesn't know how to tell you. However, we have no way of finding this out; I think it's time to stop trying to woo him and to ask him exactly what's going in, in the least confrontational way possible.

Perhaps to out to eat somewhere quiet and serene (not like a Fridays or somewhere similar) and talk to him about how you feel and ask him how he's feeling. If he continues to say nothing is wrong, then you know he's not telling you the truth. And make sure to not get married until this is sorted out; marriage will only make things worse.

Here is the link to our most popular thread on this very subject: http://www.empowher.com/community/ask/why-doesnt-my-boyfriend-want-have-sex-me-anymore?page=6

Tell me what you think!

August 4, 2010 - 12:50pm
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