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Is your significant other making you fat?

By December 29, 2008 - 12:50pm
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We all have free will. I get it. But sometimes other people's habits become our own. Take for example, eating ... and drinking. Ever wonder why your significant other can spend a week on the couch eating Doritos and not gain a pound? While even if you eat celery sticks all week, you'll end up with tighter paints?

Men and women rarely can eat the same way and the book Your Big Fat Boyfriend: How to Stay Thin When Dating a Diet Disaster addresses it.

Have you ever picked up someone else's eating and drinking habits to regret it later? How did you turn it around?

Add a Comment7 Comments

Alison, I really like the idea of a late-in-the-day workout. I've never considered that before; I tend to workout either first thing in the morning, or at lunch, and if I haven't gone by lunch, that day is pretty much a goner as far as exercise.

Now I'm wondering if just going to the gym in the late afternoon would be enough of a pick-me-up that I would be motivated to eat well afterward. I always eat better when I'm working out; it just seems to go more easily with the territory. And late afternoon is when I'm having my work slump anyway; I swear I get done in one hour in the morning something that takes me two or three hours in the afternoon.

Now that you have a toddler, do you find yourself being the one who plans the meals?

December 31, 2008 - 9:19am

This has been a popular post! :-)

My hubby and I actually eat in opposite ways; we often say we "polarize" the other one (90% of the time it works; the other 10% it is frustrating!). When he is snacking in his home office on chips, I am pretty good about staying away from them and having some whole wheat toast. When I snack on cookies, he's eating a carrot stick in front of me. It works out that when one of is snacking, the other one is eating healthfully (which, in turns, makes the other "non-healthy" eater bitter!). Someone can do a psychological test on this relationship.... LOL.

However, we do have the same eating habits when we go out to eat. We both love our chips, queso & salsa. One bowl of chips between the two of us is never enough...gasp! Paired with a large bowl of queso and a margarita and beer...oh man...we're probably eating an entire day's worth of calories when you include the actual entree!

December 30, 2008 - 3:24pm

What I find difficult is how I let my DH affect my evening habits.

I work at home; he works outside the home. When he gets home, the television goes on to watch the news or a program, and it’s the perfect time for a glass of wine. He snacks on chips, which means I snack on something, and then we figure out what’s for dinner (without kids in the house, there’s no set time for this). This would probably not be the pattern I’d fall into on my own. When I worked outside of the house, I was rarely home during “the cocktail hour,” so we never formed good habits for that 5-7 time frame. We honestly don’t know how to do it.

We’re both news junkies, so it’s natural to turn the television on. And then it stays on, and the snacks continue, and any momentum I had to do other things sort of fades away. I find myself being sedentary and (often) bored during the evening, but I seem to not do anything about it, which is discouraging.

And for some reason, the concept of planning dinners ahead of time just eludes me. I guess I’m resistant to being the one who takes the responsibility for what “we’re” eating – even though I’m clearly not happy with the way we’re eating now.

Hmmm. This is food for thought for my new year.

December 30, 2008 - 9:31am
(reply to Diane Porter)


That is exactly how my hubby and I were after work. We were exhausted and looking forward to sitting on the couch, drinking a beer and watching TV. Now we have a toddler, and have no real flexibility in when we eat (at 5:30pm...which is still funny to us, because we used to eat dinner anytime between 7-9pm, whenever we felt like it!).

One idea: have you thought about going to the gym after work to watch the news on TV, while you walk on the treadmill? Just bring some headphones to plug into the exercise machine of your choice, and it feels great to walk or stair-step (or whatever) for 30-45 minutes while watching the news. You don't have to gear up for a hefty workout, just a leisurely/moderate walk. You'll probably eat a healthier dinner, get rid of your evening boredom (I used to have a huge problem with that too!), and then can still enjoy a cocktail when you get home if you wish.

Oh, and regarding meal planning: I never did that either. Have you tried one of the stores that you can prepare the meal in advance? Super Suppers is one, Dream Dinners is another one. These saved me while I worked full-time, because I already made the dinner and just had to pop it into the oven (or, my hubby could read the directions and pop it in himself!). It was great: the portions are controlled, and I lost weight AND saved money on our monthly grocery bill. It's a fabulous alternative!!

here's to 2009! :-)

December 30, 2008 - 3:31pm

My DH doesn't really care for sweets; but, he does love the fattiest foods! I have a relentless sweet tooth, but I can't eat the same things he can. The holidays always present challenges to my otherwise careful, healthful eating regimen - and I am weak enough to cave in to his special requests. After all, these are the holidays.

He's not making me fat. My cooking for him is making me fat - LOL!

December 29, 2008 - 5:26pm

Yikes is your post timely! After spending 4 consecutive-blissful days with my, 45 pounds lighter than me husband, who has surrounded himself with every known holiday cookie, and candy in the world, I find myself following his eating very poor eating patterns. I believe you have to take responsibility for your own eating habits but I do admit letting down my guard and falling into "his" eating habits. It it time to "cleanse" and rid our holiday house of all cookies, cakes, candy-Be gone sweet tasting goodies!

December 29, 2008 - 2:33pm
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My husband grew up with healthy foods but definitely had the sweet snacks, salty snacks, pop, you name it. He was not just thin - he was skinny. He's also very tall. In college he was 6'5" and 165 lbs!!

Now that we are married and living together, I ask him not to buy his junk foods because I don't need the temptation. He does the grocery shopping. He still indulges with chips and ice-cream but in general, he's getting better at not bringing junk into the house. And I am doing well with not eating it when it's here but I do indulge on occasion and although it's my own fault, it's maddening that it's here!

I did give him dozens and dozens of bars of chocolate after Hallowe'en to take to his workplace. Had I not, I would have eaten it.

After my second child, I picked up his snacking habits and had a very hard time losing the weight. After my third, I had to make a concentrated effort to go back to my ways, not his, and it worked (finally).

He is now about 10 lbs over-weight and bothers him not the slightest! My goal is to make sure 10 lbs over-weight now, does not drift into 20 in a few years and 50lbs a few years after that.

December 29, 2008 - 2:15pm
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