I would like to start with something I wrote in the program for Erin's memorial service to put her life in some context.
A Mother’s Tribute
Our Erin was a happy, easy baby always smiling. Our priest, Father John McDonough, gave her the perfect nickname: Bubbles.
Her older sister, loved fixing Erin’s beautiful, long, dark curls. She thought Erin looked like one of her baby dolls. Once, she placed Erin on her bed next to a row of her dolls and took her picture. You couldn't tell the doll from the baby.
Being the center of attention and making people laugh was Erin’s specialty. She was a little fish, learning to swim and jumping off the diving board at the age of three. She loved that all eyes were on her, lunging fearlessly from the board and dogpaddling to the ladder to the applause of all. She was so dramatic that by the time she was four she was taking acting classes in Las Vegas. Her rendition of a slice of bacon sizzling in a frying pan put us in stitches. Later, in Florida at the age of seven, Erin dressed up in my beach cover-up, put all my rings and jewelry on and did a dance on the table at our favorite outdoor beach restaurant to everyone's delight.
Erin also was a prankster. When her relatives came to see the family off at the airport before our move to the Philippines, Erin decided we weren’t anxious enough before the long flight to the far away place. She yelled out "flight canceled” and had us all jump in alarm.
Erin’s high school years included joining both the varsity swim team and an acting troop in Hawaii—where, at Mililani High School, she also worked for her school newspaper. She came into her own as a talented writer at D.C.’s George Washington University, where she excelled academically and became deeply interested in politics. Erin joined H. Ross Perot’s campaign and then after college graduation, worked for senators Tom Harkin, Bennett Johnston and the current Majority Leader, Harry Reid. Eventually, she moved into the private sector as a legislative analyst for Answer Corp but nothing made her as happy as when she married the love of her life, Josh Stewart.
Unfortunately, that happiness was no match for her illness. After a seventeen-year struggle, Erin finally succumbed to the disease of anorexia nervosa. Her death is a great loss for everyone who ever giggled with her. She has left behind the great grief of her husband, her parents,and her sister, brother in law,and nieces and nephew. We're all shocked and saddened by her death,and will always miss her, and will also wonder what her life might have been,if she had been given a longer life.
Mary S
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Seeing this story from a mothers perspective is difficult, as it reminds me of my mother hurting and crying for me to get better for years and years.
September 6, 2011 - 8:06amYour daughter sounded wonderful, and know she is with you always.
Stay strong, & you and your family are in my prayers.
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Mary,
Thank you so much for sharing a piece of Erin with us. As a mother, I do not even want to begin to think of the pain you've been through. It was very brave of you to share your tribute to Erin with us and we hope to hear from you again.
Wishing you and your family the best,
Rosa
August 22, 2011 - 7:29amThis Comment
im sorry for your loss, but this story is more=so about your daughter than the anorexia it'sself. how did it begin, why and when did it start, did she get any kind of help in hospitals, was she overweight/underweight to begin with. you should write about her struggle with anorexia, not just how great of a kid she was
August 22, 2011 - 2:27amThis Comment
Mary,
March 7, 2009 - 6:22amI feel deeply for your loss. I have a young beautiful daughter and the mere thought of losing her is a frightening thought. The struggles that our daughters face in this era are huge. I wish you and your family strength to deal with Erin's loss. Good Luck.
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I hope telling Meg's story helps you to continue to find comfort in her memories. I am sure many others will benefit from your postings. Perhaps your story will positively impact the policies and supports for our military families.
February 28, 2009 - 12:51pmWarmly,
Gail
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Anon, it's frightening that you're being asked to speak to fifth graders, but I know the need is there. My 12-year-old niece, who has been busy growing quite tall and is therefore very lanky for her age -- not an inch of fat on her body right now -- has declared herself too big. She said someone at school told her she weighed too much. If you were to see her on the middle-school basketball court, you would call her skinny. You would say, "I'm sure she'll fill out one day."
It is insidious that our young girls are feeling this way and are making one another feel this way. And while the right messages and support from their families is incredibly important, there's just something undeniably magical for them about peer pressure at this age. I hope your book is picked up by a lot of families dealing with this issue and that they'll get help, either from it or because of it.
February 26, 2009 - 9:11amThis Comment
Diane:
Thank you so much for your kind words. My daughter told me that when she was twelve, boys made fun of her thighs (they weren't fat), and her three best friends were thinner than she. She decided (from peer pressure) that she was too fat and needed to lose weight.
I hope between parents like us who are aware of how much children are influenced by peer pressure and the media, will spread the word that there is no "ideal" body image. Your twelve-year-old niece is beautiful and unique, like a snowflake. There is no one else like her.
February 26, 2009 - 9:51amThis Comment
Since I published my children's book about a young student who developed an eating disorder, called Thin Club, many young women approached me with tears in their eyes that they, too, have suffered with an eating disorder. A parent recently asked me to speak to a fifth-grade class about my book as one of the students asked her if it was OK to "throw-up" to lose weight. The desire to have the perfect body has permeated our children, and I hope discussions by wonderful, courageous women about what they have gone through and how they have triumphed will help us all to heal and help others.
February 25, 2009 - 10:34amThis Comment
I suffered from anorexia from the time I was 11 to 36. I went into treatment 3 times, for months at a time. Severe depression and the circumstances at home were my underlying causes. After the first treatment, my family came together emotionally for the first time. They participated vigorously in my second treatment. As I entered for the third time, I came down with an unknown virus and my liver failed. I needed a transplant at the age of 21. I told myself I didn't have time for an eating disorder anylonger. Even though I had flirted with death for so many years, the transplant made my mortality real.
February 25, 2009 - 1:18amThis Comment
Tara, I hope you remember me. My name is Dan, I use to ride you to our group classes. I'd love to talk to you personally, concerning your health. [email protected]
December 5, 2011 - 1:00amThis Comment