I need someone to talk to. Been married for 41 1/2 years. My husband is diagnosed with PTSD with VA. Last holiday he almost died from alcohol poisoning. Two days ago he took too many pills, which his body rejected by throwing up. Yesterday he admitted he did try to kill himself, with thoughts of using either by pills or gun. He apologized for this and swears it won't happen again and made me promise that I will not tell anyone, and to trust him again. Thru Christmas our kids, grandkids and their animals all stayed at our home for a week which, (although he did not let on) irritated him. If I did any complaining, such as when dishwasher did not work right, he took it personal. He admitted anything I say negative he takes personal which makes me scared to let my feelings out in case he tries something again. I'm afraid to contact the VA. In the past they kept him so doped up he destroyed two vehicles. Walked around in the nude all the time, etc. Right now he has control of all our bills and since I had foot surgery not too long ago, I depend on him driving. I hid all pill except his mandatory Blood Pressure meds and prozac, and hid the key to the locked gun cabinet. I'm afraid if I also let our kids know, (they both live a long distance away) they will call someone and take him away to a psych hospital. My husband will be 63 in a week and I am 59. I'm worried the more problems we let known, the more "senile" we will be accused of being and the less control we will have over our own lives.
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Hello, Rettalee,
Thank you for sharing with us. I am so sorry to hear about your situation. First of all I want to say that you are a very brave and strong women. You made a good decision to hide the pills and the key to the gun cabinet.
One thing you did not mention but I think you may want to consider, is taking on responsibilities that were once his. You understand his capabilities more than anyone at this time. Do not hesitate to take on full responsibility in things that will negatively affect both of you if he loses daily functional abilities.
I can understand that this situation may leave you feeling alone. However, it sounds like you have a good relationship with your kids. I know it is scary to trust anyone with this information when you risk looking weak, or incapable. But I'm sure your kids would only want the best for their dad just as you want the best for your husband. So, I suggest that you let them help you. I'm sure they would surround you with the support and advice that you need at this time.
In this day and age there are so many resources for people PTSD and suicidal tendencies. You do not have to worry about him being put in a psycho hospital because that cannot happen if you don't want it to. I'm sure your kids don't want that for him either.
In these cases, it is best it keep him in a safe place; the place you and your family feels is best for him and research what resources are there for you.
Here is also a link to treatments for PTSD that we have here on EmpowHER.
https://www.empowher.com/posttraumatic-stress-disorder-ptsd/content/trea...
I genuinely hope you find the best way to help your husband come to a stable place. Let us know if you have more questions along the way.
Faith
January 4, 2015 - 12:37amThis Comment