The workplace is filled with different kinds of people, each with their own goals and ambitions in life. Some have had their career and life goals set since they were children and have always seemed to know what they were going to do with their lives while others realized what they wanted in their lives at a later age; however, there are many others who never really had any plan for life. Some may have had set goals at one time, but for whatever reason have lost interest in them over time. Regardless of the reason for losing interest in goals, or for never really having any, it can cause some difficulty later on in life when one comes to a point when they ask themselves, “What am I doing, what do I want and why am I even here?”
Not having a direction in life, or not knowing what you really want out of life can become troubling over time. Without any goals or real ambitions, doing the same monotonous job might seem fine, though they never really get anything out of it. Over time, a life without direction or effort can lead to a few problems later in life. As one gets older, it is inevitable they will begin asking themselves what it is they feel they have done with their lives. It can often lead to someone feeling greatly disappointed in their self or even depressed, especially if they feel they have only wasted their life.
Work takes up a good portion of one’s life, which is why one should be sure they enjoy what they are doing. The best thing a person can do for themselves is to keep looking and working until they find the job they are happy with. There is little else more rewarding than coming home from a hard day’s work at a job one enjoys going to most of the time. With a relatively enjoyable job and a goal to strive for, life starts to take on a purpose and life doesn’t seem such a waste of time as it would have if there was nothing to look forward to.
Sometimes, it can be difficult for some to pinpoint what it is that they would like to strive for in life. Even looking for the kind of job a person would enjoy most can be difficult, especially for younger people under pressure to decide what they want to go into before choosing the right university to enroll in. Anyone facing these kind of road blocks in their life might find it beneficial to speak to an online counselor. One could easily find an online counseling site through which they can discreetly contact an online counselor. An online therapist would be more than happy to help sort one’s thoughts as to what direction they want to head in life. Not only will online therapy offer a person the opportunity to get an idea of what they want to get out of life, it is completely confidential and can be done from anywhere there is an internet connection.
If you or anyone that you know would care for more information on this post, feel free to visit http://www.completecounselingsolutions.com/
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Ok ladies, you have to check out Ananya S. Rajan's latest book, "Get Real! Fighting The Mythic Woman Finding Your Authentic Self." The main portion of this book covers this very subject... basically how we as women do what we have to do, following the rules, in order to get through life. In turn it has kept us from focusing on our own inner development, cheating us out of joyful and fulfilling lives. It is a very inspiring book that teaches women how to stop this pattern so that we as women can live our dreams and live up to our full potential.
June 15, 2012 - 5:51pmhttp://www.fightingthemythicwoman.com/
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great article and comments!
April 18, 2012 - 5:07pmI know why I stay sober, away from drugs, bad influences. I know why I remain polite in public. I know why I have had goals in the past. I know why I've let them go. I don't know why I am alive other than that I was born. I don't believe the popular romantic artistic ideal that the mainstream media and hollywood films show us every minute of the day. I don't believe that passion is the route to knowing. All these things are just one way of viewing life, a chosen philosophy. Why not choose another instead? I have no ambition to climb the social ladder. To tell people how to live. To engage in politics. All those things are destructive. I see things that are good, things that are interesting, but I don't wish to dedicate my life to them. I don't encourage anyone to follow me. I do not promote my values as true and right. I chose to live my own life and because my life focuses on what I think is important, people say I have no ambition, but it is just that they cannot see what I see. Most of all they cannot see themselves and that part of their values involve controlling or destroying people like me. They are not satisfied until everyone is like them. Noting wrong with that, it just means there will always be conflict. Life would not be so fearful for them, they would not fear lack of purpose so much, if they would admit that.
December 6, 2009 - 4:23pmAnon,
You sound content, which is important. You sound like you have your feet on the ground and are very conscious of what's going on around you, and you've made decisions that make you feel right about the way you live your life. All that is good.
I'm sorry you feel that others are out to change you, though it's probably understandable. They may not see you doing anything but "going through the motions." They may not understand that you actually have reasons for the choices that you've made and that you're happy with those reasons.
Thought-provoking comments, for sure. Thank you.
December 8, 2009 - 8:24amI don't think that you have decide what you want to do with your life at 18 or even 38, you just have to keep on trying and try to have joy in your life. You do spend a lot of hours on your work, so it needs to have enjoyment for you. What you do in college is not nearly as important as just graduating and then figuring out what you want to do.
It is about, I think caring about yourself and working towards self awareness.
Dr. Jennifer Baxt
March 21, 2009 - 7:06amjennifer@completecounselingsolutions.com
http://www.completecounselingsolutions.com
My DH and I met my kid sister and her boyfriend for brunch last weekend. The conversation turned toward my younger son who has been a college undergrad for 10 years, now, because he keeps changing his major. He started with Business, then Music, then Film, then a number of other things before going back to Music. He's even trying to get his pilot's license.
My sister's boyfriend, a professional musician and the Music Director for a very well-known poet/songwriter, said he can't quite relate to not knowing what you want to do in life. For him, it was easy to decide upon music because he was good at it and enjoyed it enough to want to make it a career.
Well, that's just where some of us have trouble trying to decide what we want to be when we grow up. My son is one of those kids who is great at everything he tries, but it has taken him a decade to decide which talent would become his career. Coming from a family of classically trained and professional musicians, I'm really thrilled he is seriously pursuing music.
It's also hard for me to relate to not having any ambition in life, and I've often wonder what happened in someone's childhood to have grown up aimless. Was that person surrounded by over-achievers, or by other people who had no sense of direction? Did that person have trouble focusing in school and lacked support from teachers? Was the person subjected to ridicule or overly critical people on a regular, tormenting basis?
My grandfather often said that a bored person is a boring person, and I've strived to never be bored or boring (the latter part is hard, LOL!). I'm afraid I don't have any patience for boredom.
March 20, 2009 - 5:36pmThe task of figuring out one's purpose in life has so much more to it, however, than ambition. Many people, especially in today's economy, would be very fulfilled just knowing that they can do a good day's work, get paid for it, and keep a roof over their family's heads. For many people, finding their life's work or their inner calling has to wait until more prosperous times, when opportunities are more plentiful.
There are also other ways to be fulfilled, if a person has a job that's not ideal but wants to keep it. By volunteering, taking a class, or just learning one new skill, life can seem fresh and important. And goals don't have to be about the workplace: A goal might be to save money for a trip to a place you've always wanted to visit, to achieve a certain level of physical fitness or to start a journal.
There are also books and websites that help a person hone in on their aptitudes and consider how to use those interests in their work life:
Wishcraft, by Barbara Sher (a great website with free downloads from the book):
http://www.wishcraft.com/
What Color is your Parachute, by Dick Bolles:
http://www.jobhuntersbible.com/
Do What You Love, The Money Will Follow By Marsha Sinetar, Ph.D
March 20, 2009 - 8:50amhttp://www.marshasinetar.com/
I agree. For some of us, we get to do what we love and get paid for it. For most of us, we do what we do to feed our kids and put a roof over their heads.
I've never really understood how anyone is ready and able to declare their college major at the age of 18! Good for them for being so centered but I didn't really even know who I was at that stage, nevermind what I wanted to do for a lifetime of work!
I also changed my major a couple of times in college (and I went to college later than most) but since I swapped majors to minors and vice versa, I managed the degree in four years. However, I also had a mortgage to pay and had to work in an office full-time while in college and hated every minute of it. I'm simply not an "office" person and had no intention of making it my career. But you do what you have to do to pay the bills.
Now I get to do what I really want to do but it took some time to get here.
Diane's suggestion of keeping your job to pay your bills and finding satisfaction in other ideas is great. I know people who couldn't care less about their jobs or careers and that's not changing any time soon. They have them to pay the bills and provide health insurance. Their many extra curricular activities are what they live for and love - often in the Arts - writing, music, film, theater, art etc. These are areas that traditionally pay very little (if at all) so the "day job" pays the bills and the Arts are what feed the soul. I really admire these people who are responsible enough to pay their way through life but have a great love that's not necessarily their "career".
And there is also the chance that these extra curricular activities actually lead to a career in that very field. That happens surprisingly often. Wouldn't a smart employer hire someone who loves their "hobby" so much that they've done it for free?!
It's the person who has no interest in career AND no outside interests that would worry me. I think we all need to live for something - whether it's our job or not.
March 21, 2009 - 6:22am