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Domestic abuse can take all forms - from physical violence to abuse that is emotional and psychological. It is important to recognize the signs of domestic abuse.
According to HELPGUIDE.org, the most significant sign of this form of abuse is fear of your partner. If you have to be very cautious around your partner and constantly be on your guard so as to not make your partner angry, the possibilities are that your relationship is unhealthy.
Here are some telltale signs that you are in an abusive relationship. Are you afraid of your partner? Do you avoid certain topics for fear of angering your partner? Do you believe that you deserve to be mistreated? Do you feel emotionally numb? Does your partner humiliate you? Does your partner belittle your accomplishments? Does your partner blame you for his/her abusive behavior? Does your partner view you as property or as a sex object, rather than as a person? Other signs may include the fact that your partner has an unpredictable temper, or the fact that the partner threatens to hurt or kill you.
In sexual abuse, the partner forces you to participate in unwanted or degrading sexual activity. Any kind of forced sex is rape.
It is still abuse if physical abuse seems minor. A person can be seriously hurt by being pushed. Incidents of physical abuse that occur one or two times can escalate. It is not okay if the abuse stops because you become passive in order to prevent it from reoccurring. According to HELPGUIDE.org, “It is not a victory if you have to give up your rights as a person and a partner in exchange for not being assaulted.”
It is still abuse if you are emotionally and verbally assaulted. According to the above mentioned website, “The aim of emotional abuse is to chip away at your feelings of self-worth and independence.”
The forms of emotional abuse may include yelling. name-calling, intimidation and isolation. People who are emotionally abused may resort to threats of physical violence if you don’t do what they want you to do.
Economic abuse is not talked about very much, but it can include the following: controlling your finances, withholding money, making you account for everything you spend, withholding such necessities as food, clothing, medication and even shelter. The abuser may prevent you from working, may sabotage your job, and may restrict you to an allowance.
Add a Comment3 Comments
Glad to see your post, Anna. It's so important to spread the word that abuse is more than hitting. Thanks.
August 27, 2010 - 10:32amJoanna V Hunter, author of But He'll Change; End the Thinking that Keeps You in an Abusive Relationship.
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Thanks for your comments, Joanna.
August 27, 2010 - 11:27amI don't think the abusers ever really do change.
Anna
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They can if they truly want to change and then they have to do the work to learn a new way to relate to others. Many of them give up and return to the behaviors that are familiar to them.
August 27, 2010 - 11:33amAs long as they get what they want by their bad behavior, there is no reason for them to change.
Joanna
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