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Is adoption an option for you?

By August 12, 2010 - 8:24am

Would you consider adoption as an option if it is not possible for you to have a biological child? Or would you consider adoption as an option if you have an unplanned pregnancy and know that you do not have the resources to raise a child?

By February 21, 2011 - 5:04am

I cant have children and i want to adopt but my husband wont allow it. he says if we cant have natural born children then we wont at all. how am i suppose to deal with this?

February 21, 2011 - 5:04am
By October 26, 2010 - 7:59am

Hi! Susan,
You raise some interesting points, particularly about DNA. While we all may come into the world "programmed" to a certain extent because of our DNA, how we are loved, nurtured, encouraged to develop our potential, and presented with experiences makes a huge difference in how we turn out. No matter what combinations of DNA we have, each person has a unique blend of characteristics and experiences.

I think resources are far more than finances. Resources include relationships, the ability to place a child's needs before your own, recognition of a child's interests and talents, and so much more. Lack of finances is hard, but poverty of the spirit (lack of interest, inability to spend time with a child, negative attitudes, etc.) is devastating to a child.

There are circumstances in which placing a child for adoption is in the child's best interests. I have a great deal of respect for women who choose adoption for their child. I admire their courage and selflessness.

Thanks so much for your insights and comments. I'd really like to read more about what you think.

October 26, 2010 - 7:59am
By HERWriter Guide October 26, 2010 - 7:08am

Hi Linda

Had I not been able to have children biologically then I would have absolutely adopted. I've never taken huge stock in DNA and to this day, I don't look at my kids like "you're half me!" or that kind of thing. Blood relations have never been that important to me, because it's "relations" that actually matter.

As far as giving a baby up for adoption - I couldn't answer that unless I was in that position. I think hormones and pregnancy would make a huge difference so it's hard to say without having that factor in.

I'd love to think I could be strong enough to give my baby up, if I could not give her/him a great start in life but then again, many of us have come from nothing, or bad backgrounds and have turned out fine!

Great questions - thank you!

October 26, 2010 - 7:08am

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This group is a forum for discussion of adoption. It is for prospective adoptive parents and birth parents, as well as for women who have placed a child for adoption and women who have adopted a child.




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