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Going on to achieve goals in life while your spouse can not.

By March 11, 2013 - 1:04pm

It is soooo hard to push on in life while my husband can not. He has been ill with a liver illness for 22 years. He fell ill 6 months after we got married at ages 22 and 23. He wasn't bad at first so we went on and had 3 wonderfully gifted children, he started a carpentry business and I worked part-time as a music teacher. Over the years he became more ill, I had to stop working to care for him and his business failed, however, our children became more skilled in the arts. I was home to take him to the hospital and to his appointments, to take my children to recitals and art shows, and I began to work on a degree. Now, here it is 21 1/2 years later. My husband's been on the transplant waiting list for 6 years, we have 2 children in college, I have a B.A. in Education and tuition has piled up very quickly. I am back to work part-time but with my husband being ill, it is harder now than before. Things are hard but I try not to complain because I know God has blessed us through the years. With all of the tough times we've gone through, our children have continued to press on. They are our biggest blessings. They keep us encouraged. I don't know if I will have a job next year but, I know God will make a way. He's been doing it all along.

By HERWriter Guide March 15, 2013 - 9:39am

Hi Tamra

Thanks for such a great post - it's a topic that we don't really talk about, lest we be seen as selfish or not permanently focused on others.

I know most of what you have done has been for your kids and family but it's good to see you are well-educated and well-rounded with successful children.

Do you know that there are caregiver groups that can help you? They can find ways for you to take a break and give yourself some time to rejuvenate? You can go an internet search for a group near you, and hospitals have several of them that you could contact - contact your local hospitals.

Your children are working hard in college and that's a great thing - but are they also supporting you? It's definitely possible for them to help out, especially if they live within a few hours of you.

Let me know what you think and you are an inspiration to so many - but even so, you could do with a break - everybody in your situation needs some time off and time away.



March 15, 2013 - 9:39am

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