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I feel unwanted

By July 9, 2012 - 4:53pm

Let me start by saying I do have a life and I don't let these problems consume me....normally. But this has become far too exhausting and I need help! My bf and I have been together for about 4 yrs. As all relationships do, ours started out with an amazing sex life we were always horny and always ready to get it on. FFW to now, I'm lucky if he touches me. I am a very sexual person, I always have been, I'm open to new things. He is not lovey dovey, he does not touch me or look at me with passion or lust. I don't feel sexy, or attractive bc, let's face it, if your own bf isn't attracted to you, who the hell is? I have always been a confident person but I have let this drag me down. This "we don't have condoms... Shucks" bull is gettin old. If he really wanted too have sex, he would go buy some. Ive tried to talk to him
About it but he doesnt really have a lot to say about it. Its gotten to the point where I am doubting my feelings towards him. He is really a very good man. A hard worker, kind to people, good on paper. It's getting difficult to behave and not go looking for what I need. HELP ME!!!

By HERWriter Guide October 24, 2012 - 2:52pm

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October 24, 2012 - 2:52pm
By October 15, 2012 - 5:37am

There is usually a reason for a man not wanting sex, it can be you really do need to talk about anything that is bothering him. I am not saying this is your reason but my husband was seeing someone else. We were still having sex but it didn't feel right, towards the end it was less loving and it appeared to be an effort and I was feeling hurt. Look for the signs of a cheat, just in case! My husband had all the classic signs. be aware honey don't get fooled!

October 15, 2012 - 5:37am
By HERWriter Guide October 8, 2012 - 4:58pm

I have nothing to add to Astridhaze's excellent advice. I hope you are following it and things are improving. Please let us know how you are doing when you have time - we'd love to hear more from you!


October 8, 2012 - 4:58pm
By September 27, 2012 - 6:51pm

I don't advocate ignoring or playing mind games- that is just annoying. I think you need to tell him directly that your lack of sex bothers you. Yes, couples have less sex after the honeymoon phase of any relationship, but slowing down to none is not healthy. You may find he didn't know it bothered you this much, or you may find that he's got some of his own issues going on. I doubt that it's because he thinks your're not attractive, but I definitely can empathize with you.

September 27, 2012 - 6:51pm
By July 28, 2012 - 5:22am

you could also tell him it really bothers you, or you could walk away and ignore him for awhile, watch tv and avoid talking to him even if he talks to you. somtimes guys need a big huge reality check.

July 28, 2012 - 5:22am
By July 14, 2012 - 9:49pm

I actually am experiencing the same situation as you currently. Have you tried to speak to him about your concerns? I let it build up until it blew up one day. We have started talking about it and he had no idea that is how I felt. It is still a problem but I believe talking about it is the first step to trying to find a solution. In my significant others case, he has been stressing about work and not telling me, causing the lack of interest. I hope you guys can work it out, it is clear that you do love him. Best Wishes

July 14, 2012 - 9:49pm

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