Have a question? We're here to help. Ask the Community.
ASKAs Andy Rooney once confessed, older women are far sexier than their younger counterparts.
"Her libido is stronger because her fear of pregnancy is gone ... and her lovemaking is honed."
A compliment to be sure, this acquired confidence may, in fact, only apply to a small cohort of women, especially as we enter menopause. According to a 2008 study from the Archives of Internal Medicine, almost half of all menopausal women experience a decrease in libido. What's more, is that only 25 percent of these women report being concerned about this drop in sexual desire.
So what's the reason behind the midlife turn-off? Low estrogen levels responsible for other notorious menopausal symptoms like hot flashes and decreased sleep also contribute to altered arousal thresholds and overall interest in sex. During menopause, a woman may not respond to the same turn-ons or triggers that she had only years before, and all this is normal.
In addition to a baseline decrease in libido, other factors complicate the issue. Decreased estrogen also decreases blood supply to the vagina, creating a drier and potentially more irritated environment. Issues with bladder control and sleep disturbance can also interfere, as can depression and other stressors that may arise around the menopause.
But, like Rooney so keenly picked up on, not all women experience this decline. Some women, in fact, report an increase in libido that might have something to do with an acquired confidence over time.
For others however, the Cleveland Clinic suggests the following tips for improving sex drive. Water-soluble lubricants like Astroglide or K-Y Jelly can improve vaginal dryness, and distraction techniques to relax can decrease anxiety that may arise during this transitional period.
While the research to support using hormone replacement to increase sexual drive during menopause is a somewhat conflicting, some doctors do prescribe combined estrogen and progesterone pills for this purpose. Like with hormone replacement for other menopausal symptoms however, you should discuss the length of time using hormones and risks/benefits of use with your care provider first.
Add a Comment5 Comments
hello , I have trouble with my libido it tends to come and go and my husband dont understand that it hurts sometimes even with lubes I dont know why that is but we dont have sex alot and he works almost all the time I sure wish I had some or some thing that could help with this as I have had a hysterectomy for 7 going on 8 years now.
October 21, 2011 - 6:44pmThis Comment
great article. I posted one along these lines with a slightly different angle - see: Women Get Better With Age – and So Does the Sex!
December 16, 2010 - 10:21am(Link removed by EmpowHER moderator.)
Menopause is perhaps the most difficult period that a woman will experience in her life and to deal with this issue they are best to see a doctor. Menopause is a period of hormonal change, indicated by the end of menstruation and often accompanied by symptoms that are more or less specific in nature. It marks the turning point in a woman’s life, characterizing the end of her child-bearing years.
There are as well a lot of side effects associate’s with menopause and they include vaginal dryness, hot flashes, insomnia, depression, loss of libido, etc. Any woman who experiences these situations, should definitely see a doctor to get hormone replacement drugs.
January 21, 2010 - 10:59amMy Gynocologist is the very best Doctor I have ever had. He is patient, he has literally helped me with a horrible cyst, severe vaginal dryness, and a thickening in my uteren wall.
January 18, 2010 - 2:11pmHowever- even though he has inquired about my sex life, and I have been very honest, it isn't getting better. I cannot have an orgasm.
He gave me estrogen, testosterone, and a stimulas cream that all should have worked.
I have lupus (I lost 60 lb's and have kept the weight off for 2 years.) I am bi-polar, I have high blood pressure, I take valium for stress , I have a very high powered job in the studio industry in So. Cal. and I make an incredible salerey.
I have been married to the most wonderful man for 16 years, and he cannot kep his hands off me (I am so lucky) however, I cannot seem to get an pleasure in bed no matter what he does.
I have been in menopause for 3 years (my doctor gave me a WONDERFUL Cream for my hot flashes) but I am so depressed about my lack of libido...
I am also not comfortable telling his receptionists what I need to talk to him about, and my work schedule usually makes me miss his call.
As I said- he is the best, what else should I ask him so that he can help me?
Are you kidding...she needs a younger man, that is what she needs!!! Why waste experience on experience when experience can be wasted on youth? Older women, get thee to younger men who are delicious, feisty, fun, and creative. Teach them well, and when they go back to a woman their own age, such a woman will be glad to have had her man schooled by you!!! I speak from experience. My first two lovers were schooled by much older women, one of whom was a devotee of tantra before tantra was hip and cool...before tantra was even discussed on the Huffington Post because there was way, way, way no such thing as the Huffington Post:-) I am so glad that these young men were schooled by older women!
January 4, 2010 - 3:55am