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How to Help Someone Who May Be Suicidal

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offering help to someone feeling suicidal Andrea Morini/Photodisc/Thinkstock

There are few things more frightening than knowing that a friend or family member is so despondent that he or she sees no reason to go on living.

Suicides now account for more deaths than car accidents, so concerns about suicide should not be taken lightly. Knowing the warning signs, and how best to intervene, may help save a life.

Know the signs

The first step in helping a suicidal person is recognizing the signs that he or she might be contemplating suicide. A loved one may simply express suicidal inclinations.

It’s important to always take these threats seriously. Generally, a person is more likely to commit suicide if he or she has thought about how it would be carried out and has access to the means to complete the plan.

People who have brief moments of suicidal ideation due to extreme stress are less likely to go through with it, but still are at risk. If you’re not sure if your friend is feeling suicidal, or are not sure how serious the threat is, look for some common warning signs:

• Social isolation. People who cut off ties with their social network, or who don’t have a strong support system in the first place, are much more likely to harm themselves.

• Giving things away or saying goodbye.

• Devising a specific plan and acquiring the means to complete it.

• A sudden elevation in mood after a long bout of depression. People who intend to end their lives often feel relief when they think they’ve found a way out.

• Engaging in self-destructive behavior such as drug use or excessive drinking.

• Feelings of worthlessness. People who were previously sad about a loss and who now blame themselves may be contemplating suicide. People who remark that everyone would be better off without them also often feel suicidal.

Safety first

If someone you know shows signs that he or she might be suicidal, do not leave that person alone. If you can’t be with the person, ask if there is someone you can call to ensure his or her safety.

It is extremely unlikely that a suicidal person will commit the act with someone else there, and knowing that someone cares enough to ensure his or her safety may help to temporarily alleviate the most severe suicidal feelings.

If there is no one available to be with the person and you cannot do it, call the police or an ambulance as a last resort. This option should be reserved for someone who is in imminent danger, as calling 911 may create an unpredictable situation.

Listen

Take the time to listen to the person’s feelings. While you may be shocked at his or her suicidal intentions, don’t berate the person or minimize his or her problems.

People often feel suicidal when they believe that no one understands their suffering, so don’t contribute to this idea. Instead, listen responsively, empathize, and emphasize how much you care.

Who to trust

Deciding where to turn can be challenging. It’s important to keep your friend’s confidence and avoid telling people who can’t help. Betraying your friend’s trust may cause him or her to not lean on you next time.

Instead, turn to someone who is qualified to intervene. If the suicidal person is under 18, parents or a teacher may be able to assist. For adults, a family member might be the ideal choice.

Be careful about contacting someone who contributes to the suicidal feelings. For example, if a friend is upset about her divorce, don’t call her husband. If a child is angry with his father for hitting him, contacting the father is not a good choice.

Many suicide hotlines send out local crisis units that can help your friend through the immediate crisis and refer him or her to help. If you or someone you know needs assistance, call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

References:

Mayo Clinic Staff. (2012, June 09). Suicide: What to do when someone is suicidal. Mayo Clinic.
Retrieved from http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/suicide/MH00058

Suicide prevention. (n.d.). Help Guide.
Retrieved from http://www.helpguide.org/mental/suicide_prevention.htm

What can I do to help someone who may be suicidal? (n.d.). Metanoia.
Retrieved from http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/whattodo.htm

Edited by Jody Smith

GoodTherapy.org is a leading mental health directory that promotes healthy, empowering, non-pathological psychotherapy practices. Visit GoodTherapy.org to find a therapist that can help you with a variety of issues including women's issues, fertility issues, relationships & marriage, sexuality, eating issues, parenting and much more.

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