"The Professional, High-Functioning Bipolar Patient"
There exists what I’d like to call the PHFBP, or the professional, high-functioning bipolar patient.
When looking at the PHFBP, it would appear that he faces few problems. He is compliant in his treatment. He is successful in his job; he may be married and have children; he has friends, and in essence, he is happy. For the therapist, this patient might be called "the model patient." In reality, although this patient is seen as a "model" patient, he still must cope with several, important life issues. (I know because I’m a PHFBP and have been one for several years.)
The issues are as follows:
1. Do I really need to take my meds?
Medication is a sticky subject. It’s usually visible, either sitting out or in a cabinet, just sitting there for any nosey guest to come along and read the bottle. Medication also can put on the pounds, like around 50. It’s a hassle to take it every day. A nuisance. Life would be much easier without it. Wouldn’t it?
2. Should I "come out" in my family, the neighborhood or at work?
I really want to tell people, but I’m afraid of the after effects. Will they lose trust in me? I feel like an imposter, like I can’t truly be myself. Who am I, really?
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Well, the word 'faith' means believing in what you can't see. That's the short answer. In truth, it's normal to be skeptical about a higher power. In fact, based on reality on Earth, it's darn near ABNORMAL, if numbers mean anything, to have an unfaltering relationship with God.
You may not adhere to this, but with God, I keep it basic and rational: HE is omnipotent and omnipresent, and as such, he's everywhere and in charge of all things. Mix that up with saying 'well, he's not in charge of ALL things, because some are bad'...
...and you lose me. They don't call him GOD for nothing. So to your question: keep it simple and kind. Thank Him when you can, lean on Him when you must, trust him if you can't quite find it in you that moment to thank him (the concept of 'trust' is hard--it'd require another long post) and you're going to be OK
Read the Bible more and know, as it says, the Lord is never against a child who obeys and seeks after him! He delights in you. But honestly I would spend more time in the word so that you know the truth, even memorize scripture so that you know the feeling you have are not coming from God. The bible is here to to tell us the truth when our mind (satan, our sin) lies to us. Is the basics of spiritual warfare. You must allow yourself to be in the presence of god to be submerged in his truth and wisdom.
it's the cultural personality split. There is no such thing as God as a separate. That is sort of like saying I Love and then being told that Love is a being of some kind. This is a perception that we have that is generated in being self reflective. We perceive ourselves as reflecting upon ourselves and this is illusionary. We reflect on events and perceive those events as us. the statement "I lift my arm" is an absurd statement based on just being sensical but these metaphorical constructs of the observer and actor independent of each other gives rise to this. this is culturally reinforced, so even the statement "I believe in God, or I do not believe in God" is ultimately completely absurd. It's a framework with no validity to it at all. God is a place holder word of experience so the very least the experience is true, exactly what that means is not fully understood except in context of connectedness at the deepest levels. A word that has no form at it's deepest levels with no clothing. For Bi polars the word God is a very real, but it needs to be understood holistically, and thus the paradigm of internal/external dualites need to be broken. This is not easy for most people, bipolars need to learn to re frame their experiences to that and be both logical and heartful. We need to learn to demystify reality, while most people are leaning to mystify reality. Atheists live in a the same framework as religious people, they apply mysticism to reality, The perceive that they are logical. HA......LOL.
i am clinically diagnosed bipolar and i can feel every possible question and cant possibly offer any answers other than...."lets b strong"
.....why is it human kinds' needs to think so much? esp in a complexed emotional mine as someone dealing with an emotional disorder.
This is good! These are exactly the kind of questions I have (but never codified) about the condition we share. She's been there and done that and doesn't romanticize it.
-- Another PHFBP