Facebook Pixel

Dave Balch: The Stress of Assumption

By Blogger
 
Rate This

Have you ever made a mistake?

Duh, of course you have! We all have.

I have good news and bad news. The good news is that it’s not your fault. Up here in The Patient/Partner Project’s private laboratories we have identified a new disease that is running rampant among the general population of our country. We call it “C.A.D.”: “Chronic Assumptive Disorder.” This insidious condition causes us to assume things.

The bad news, unfortunately, is that there is no cure. We can, however, put it into remission, so that’s what I’m going to try to do in this article: help you put your C.A.D. into remission

The problem is a serious one for a couple of reasons:

1. People tend to assume the worst possible scenario, which can cause a lot of unnecessary stress. When my wife was diagnosed with nine brain tumors, she assumed that she had brain cancer. Pretty stressful, considering that brain cancer is much more deadly than her actual diagnosis turned out to be: breast cancer that had metastasized (spread) to the brain. Granted, this diagnosis wasn’t fun either, but it was certainly better than her assumed condition.

2. An assumption can cause havoc in your life. When we went to get a second diagnosis, the doctor needed to see the slides from her biopsy. I discovered this on Friday afternoon, the appointment was on Monday, and the lab was 45 minutes away and closed for the weekend at 5 p.m. Plus, due to timing, we would not be able to get the slides Monday on our way to the appointment. I was on a high-pressure work deadline, but I was going to have to drop what I was doing in order to drive to the lab to get the slides in time for the Monday appointment. Stressful? You bet!

So what do we do about this? How can we put our C.A.D. into remission? The key is AWARENESS: be aware of your tendency to assume. It is human nature to make assumptions about people, situations and things. If you can catch yourself in the act of assuming, you’re way ahead of most folks. Then when you catch yourself in assuming something, ASK QUESTIONS.

We asked questions about my wife’s brain tumors and discovered quickly that there was much more hope than we initially thought. I asked the lab if there was somewhere in the hospital they could leave the slides for me to pick up even after they closed. As it turned out, they left them at the 24-hour pharmacy and I picked them up very early Monday on our way to the appointment.

Never let down your guard because it’s much easier to assume something than to ask the necessary question(s).

This article is one in a series on coping strategies for patients and caregivers alike. For more thoughts on caregiving, coping strategies, reducing stress, and just plain fun, subscribe to my free monthly newsletter at http://www.CaringAndCoping.com. Need a speaker for an upcoming event? I have a program that will knock your socks off! Watch video clips at http://www.ThePPP.org/speaking/#handle.

Add a CommentComments

There are no comments yet. Be the first one and get the conversation started!

Image CAPTCHA
Enter the characters shown in the image.
By submitting this form, you agree to EmpowHER's terms of service and privacy policy
Dave Balch
Blogger View Profile Send Message

We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.