How to Act Like An Old Lady
When her next birthday arrives, she will be 105 years of age. One could reasonably assume she is resting comfortably in a secluded nursing home, wheel-chair bound, and staring blankly at a fuzzy television set. Amidst mental confusion, she might ask a nursing attendant if Truman won or if she could give the gal a dime to go get a loaf of bread. However, this 104-year-old woman is here to show how 104 is the new 54!
Since my grandmother, Kora, turned 100 years of age, I have toyed with the idea of writing a book about her incredible life. During my research over the past few years, it has become increasingly evident that she is unlike any other so-called “mature” individual. I would like to highlight how ANYONE can act like a 104-year-old and look forward to an even richer life.
1.) At your 100th birthday party, be sure to come out in a bathrobe in front of everyone and start to do a striptease. Sexily sway your hips back and forth and slowly reveal your stunning 40-year-old bathing suit. Let the act immediately stop there, grab a Margarita, and head for the nearest hot tub.
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Ann,
I'm astonished! How wonderful! This is one of my favorite posts of all time.
Even coming from a family where the woman are long-lived, I am in awe of your grandmother. I and most of my friends are just past 50, and a person does a lot of thinking right around 50 about "the next 50" and what it might hold. How much potential is there for new skills, new experiences, new arcs of development? How much time is left and how good can that time be? What will we do in our second 50 that we didn't or couldn't do in our first 50? What are the possibilities?
Thanks for reminding all of us that we better get off our keisters and get to it, because with your grandmother working on "her third 50," clearly the rest of us have some work to do in this regard! She's leaving us in the dust!
Every time I feel like I need a break or something, I merely think of my grandma and how much she has done in her life. From that perspective, I have my work cut out for me!
What a great story--it was a joy to read!
I am so curious---where did your grandmother move to?
I am also astonished that "growing old" for women is something to be dreaded and despised. We are all getting older every day, and I am saddened to see "the elderly" not being treated with respect, or sought-out for their stories.
I am in my mid-30s, and am receiving messages every day (magazine, internet, TV, junk mail) that I should make it my life mission to do everything in my power now to stop the aging process---no wrinkles, no gray hair. Why are we accepting that these qualities are ugly in the first place? I hope current and future generations will combat this negative stereotype and embrace beauty--regardless of age!
I think that society often confuses the words "elderly" or "old" with the words "frail" and "irrelevant." Ann's grandmother may be old, but she's about as far from frail or irrelevant as it gets -- and I imagine she gets plenty of respect!!
But I think once an older person starts to become frail, society starts writing him or her off, as though they no longer matter, they no longer have anything to contribute. And in a culture where that exists, I think it's natural for people to not want to appear to be old. It's almost a math equation:
If O=I and O=G, G is negative.
(As long as old=irrelevant and old=gray, gray will be seen as negative.)
When we see young people adding gray streaks to their hair because it makes them look cool, then we'll know we're getting somewhere!
I love her,too. I'm a shirttail relative and proud to say so.