Tykia Murray: When Sex Hurts
As women, we’re taught to expect the “first time” to hurt. But only the first time. Afterward, sex always feels wonderful and is mutually fulfilling for both partners.
Sadly, this is not accurate. For many women, not only is the first time painful, the second, tenth, and twentieth times are painful.
Painful intercourse is called dyspareunia. The pain is often temporary, but can be indicative of other problems. A few causes of physical discomfort during intercourse are:
Insufficient arousal – Not enough natural or synthetic lubricant could be making sex less than pleasurable. Make plenty of foreplay part of your sexual repertoire and consider adding a water-based lubricant to your lovemaking.
Menopause – Hormone fluctuations can cause, among other symptoms, vaginal dryness. Consult your doctor about possible treatments for the sexual side effects of menopause.
Urinary infection or yeast infection – These infections can cause itching and pain in the vaginal area. Drug stores offer over the counter tests for both ailments. Ultimately, you’ll want to seek treatment from a doctor, and if you believe you have a yeast infection, avoid sexual contact. Yeast infections can be transmitted from person to person.
Vaginismus – This is an over-tightening of the vaginal muscles. Treatment (ranging from psychotherapy to Botox injections) varies depending on the individual.
It’s a shame that something so pleasurable can be excruciating to endure. Though the reasons for painful sex are numerous, treatment is quite accessible. As human beings, as women, it is our right to enjoy sex and have wonderful sex lives. Seek out the sex you deserve.
We value and respect the experiences of all of our HERWriters, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.
Add a Comment2 Comments
Thank you for bringing attention to dyspareunia. Opening the door to this relatively mysterious disorder is the only way to determine what the cause(s) and treatment(s) are, putting it on the agenda and minds of the public, doctors, health plans, and those in charge of research funding. Aside from the things mentioned above, a type of dyspareunia called vulvodynia (with a subdisorder of vestibulodynia) may cause pain all by itself, regardless of an infection. It's a complicated disorder linked to many other diseases, and it should be looked into more and more... So, I congratulate you for opening that door within this forum. And, I encourage you to share more--particularly since this affects up to 15% of women at some point in their lives.
May 19, 2009 - 10:37amThis Comment
Thank you for bringing attention to dyspareunia. Opening the door to this relatively mysterious disorder is the only way to determine what the cause(s) and treatment(s) are, putting it on the agenda and minds of the public, doctors, health plans, and those in charge of research funding. Aside from the things mentioned above, a type of dyspareunia called vulvodynia (with a subdisorder of vestibulodynia) may cause pain all by itself, regardless of an infection. It's a complicated disorder linked to many other diseases, and it should be looked into more and more... So, I congratulate you for opening that door within this forum. And, I encourage you to share more--particularly since this affects up to 15% of women at some point in their lives.
May 19, 2009 - 11:41am