How do you get a depressed child into therapy when he just doesn't want to go? You can't force them, but there are some tactics that may help persuade them. GMA parenting contributor and author Ann Pleshette Murphy has advice for parents trying to get a resistant child into therapy
KATRINA: I'm Katrina Szish for howdini.com. I'm joined by Ann Pleshette Murphy, parenting expert and author of The Seven Stages of Motherhood. Nice to see you Ann.
ANN: Nice to be here.
KATRINA: How do you get a kid into therapy if they don't want to go? Because you know there's the old cliche, obviously, they have to want to be helped in order to be helped, but they might not want to do that. It might cramp their style or their image which is all important in the teenage years.
ANN: Well I think the biggest hurdle in getting kids to get help is that there still is a stigma associated with going to see a psychiatrist. You know, what do you think, there's something wrong with me? You know I don't have a big problem--I'm not a psycho, why are you wanting me to see a psychiatrist--so you absolutely may get that resistance. I think the important thing is to try and normalize it. Talk about your own experiences if you've ever seen a counselor or a therapist. To say how this is actually a real gift, I mean in fact if you can take care of your own mental health needs this is as important as taking care of you physical health. And that that as a family you value. So if you can, again, stress that you're not doing this because you think they're "mental" or that there's something really wrong with them, but you're concerned, and any more than if they had a physical symptom this is something you think merits attention. You can start with that.
KATRINA: If they still refuse after that, but you know that they need help what do you do?
ANN: Well I think it's really hard, I mean you can't physically force someone into an office. One of the things you can try is say that you want to talk as a family and to try again, especially if the depression is manifesting itself in a lot of rage or you're having fights all the time or you think that the anger that's being expressed, the moodiness, is just destroying the family life.
KATRINA: Would that be considered an intervention essentially?
ANN: Yeah I know it's very hard to stage an intervention. Again one of the signs of depression can be drug use and drug abuse. So, that, you know, becomes a whole other problem insteads of problems that have to be dealt with by having an intervention stage and not improvised. You need someone who can really show you and help you do that.
KATRINA: Okay Ann Pleshette Murphy thank you so much for all of your great advice.
Howdini is life’s little instruction manual, in HD. We’re all about bringing together the top, most respected experts in their fields to help us be the best we can be at all of the little and not-so-little challenges of our complicated lives. Howdini is the place to be for the know-how you want, when you need it. Or maybe it’s the know-how you need, when you want it. Whatever. We’re here to help. So come in and look around, won’t you?
We think you’ll love finding everything you want to learn about in one convenient place, and as we grow and add more categories and more Howdinis, you’ll be doing less surfing and more learning right here. And unlike television, Howdinis aren’t limited by time—we don’t have to break for commercials, and we’re always on.
Who is Howdini?
People often ask us, is there an actual person who is Howdini? And the answer is, it’s kind of like Lassie. Just as there were many Lassies, there are many individuals who are called Howdini. In fact, each of our experts is a Howdini, and, like all those Lassies, they really know their tricks. (Although so far there is no ‘How to tell your master that Timmy is trapped in the old abandoned mine’ segment)
Our gurus are people you know and trust because you’ve been getting advice from them for years, at places like Good Morning America, The Today Show, Money, Prevention, and Food and Wine (to name just a few). Many are best-selling authors. Others, like our medical experts, are respected leaders in their fields.
The first Howdini was Joanna Breen, who left a comfortable career at ABC’s 20/20 to create a how to video website after one too many frustrating experiences with handymen who weren’t that handy. Joanna had traveled the world reporting with Barbara Walters and others on injustice, outrage, and tragedy, but now it was time to turn her talents to dealing with crises closer to home, like what do you do if you drop your diamond ring down the drain. Joanna is the quintessential can-do girl, so she didn’t find the prospect of launching a gigantic website the least bit daunting. (Ok, that last part isn’t entirely true.)
Joanna convinced an old ABC News buddy, Shelley Lewis, to join her. Shelley had supervised roughly 9.7 million helpful how to segments during a long career executive producing television shows like Good Morning America and CNN’s American Morning. A self-described “info-pig” who loves all kinds of information programming, she is never happier than when she’s learning an amazing new tip that she can annoy share with everyone she knows. Needless to say, Howdini was a dream gig for her. A career woman, a wife, a mother, and author of two books, Shelley considers herself equally challenged by all the facets of her life.
Joanna and Shelley were introduced to marketing executive Alison Provost by a mutual friend who knew that Alison had what they needed - entrepreneurial experience, patience, and a checkbook that still had checks in it. Joanna and Shelley could see right away that Alison should join Howdini. They figured that they would take care of the programming, and Alison would bring trustworthy sponsors to help pay the bills. It took Alison significantly longer to be convinced, maybe because she was crazy busy running a marketing firm called PowerPact, which she continues to oversee while serving as the biggest of big cheeses at Howdini. But whether it’s playing Suduko or launching a new business in a field she knows little about, Alison loves the challenge of a good puzzle, It wasn’t long before she began dropping obscure internet terms like “user-interface” and “googlebot” into casual conversation.
What’s Next for Howdini?
Our goals are modest. Complete and total domination of the internet, crushing Google, Microsoft, and any other punks who get in our way. (Hey, it’s a just a goal.) But until then, we will content ourselves making the best, most professional, most credible how to videos you can find anywhere. We want to help you solve your career issues, your parenting problems, your money troubles. We want you to be more glamorous, healthier, and less stressed out. We want you to check Howdini every day for fun, interesting, useful advice from experts you know and trust.
We want to make Howdini the community you love to be part of every day, To do that, we need to hear from you. Please share your suggestions, rate and comment on the Howdini videos, and the blog, (The Howdini blog). Tell us what you’d like us to create for you.
And then, when we’ve achieved that, it’s back to working on complete and total domination of the internet.