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“No, I'm Not Having Twins!”

 
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People say strange things to pregnant women.

I became tired of being asked if I was having twins EVERYTIME I was pregnant. I also grew tired of strangers asking me when I was due and then staring at my belly with surprise, their eyes bulging when they heard my answer. Towards the end of each of my pregnancies, my stomach grew so large that it would take a while before my body got back to normal.

The funny thing about maternity clothes is that you can’t wait to wear them but the minute your baby is born, you can’t wait to pack them away, sell them, or give them to another pregnant friend. This is because you don’t want anyone to mistake you for still being pregnant. It took me a while before my body made it back to looking close to what it did before I was pregnant. I learned quickly with my first baby that after my baby was born, I didn’t want to be out in public without him.

If you are always with the baby, then even if your body still looks like you're 3 months pregnant, most people will realize and NOT ask you when you are due. However, there is always that exception.

It was two days after my third son was born. We were leaving the hospital and my husband left to bring our car around. I stood up from the wheelchair to stand by our newborn and other son. We were near an entrance and there were two men sitting and waiting. “Is that your baby?” One of the men asked me. I stared back at him. “Yes.” Dumb question. I am still wearing the hospital band and am practically glued to the side of this baby but I guess that he is just making conversation. Maybe it is time for my pain medication and I am grumpy. Then he says, “Are you having another one?” He must be joking! I stare even longer at him this time and then realize that he is actually waiting for an answer.

Oh, yes. I am a medical miracle. I am taking this baby home today and then coming back to the hospital to have another one. Idiot or jerk, I wonder which he is. “No, I am not having another one!” My voice is mean. I don’t care. He is lucky that I am still feeling a little weak. “You mean THAT is leftover from THIS ONE??” He rudely points to my stomach. Oh that is good for my new Mommy self-esteem.

Am I going to have to explain to this guy that all the weight does not disappear the moment that the baby comes out? Why doesn’t he know that what he just said is RUDE, RUDE, RUDE! The man sitting next to him looks away, uncomfortably. I have no good come back.

He starts rambling something about his wife. But I stop listening to him. He has a wife? Oh she’s lucky, alright. He’s a real catch.

I see my husband park at the entrance and begin walking towards us. Thank goodness! Let’s get OUT of here! Once we load everything into the car, we begin to drive home. The special day that our new little boy gets to see his home for the first time. I am happy but still fuming as I think about the strange man and what he said to me.

Still, I have to ask. I ask my husband the loaded question, “Do I still look pregnant to you?”
“You look beautiful.” He tells me as he kisses my hand. Yes, the people that matter, they understand and usually know just what to say.

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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.

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